Monday, July 31, 2006

A Time to Weed







Today is the last day of July. I know I shouldn’t but I feel Summer is basically over. In fact starting this week I am starting my “Summer vacation” which is essentially taking four days in August: every Friday I like this because for just the cost of 32 hours I get what to me feels like a month long vacation. Working 4 “eights” is nothing. I can do that on my head.


I actually spent some time in my garden yesterday. It was hot but there were clouds and I had my hat on so I did not get too over heated. I chopped weeds—much more entertaining then I thought the job was going to be. I even stopped half way through the project when I realized the hoes I were using were too dull to achieve any efficacy. I actually stopped my work and powered into my garage where I was totally surprised that I could reach my grinder and it was plugged in and everything. I put a sharp edge on two of the hoes and went back to the “chopping fields” and I was surprised the difference made. The only problem is that I made so much cultivated dirt it was difficult to ascertained the dead weeds from the live ones. Those weeds cunning enough to feign death and get themselves buried under the loose dirt should be visible after twenty-four hours. I am going to visit the site, maybe tonight and do the exercise again and I’ll do it again till I am sure weeds are gone. Cutting these weeds and clearing the area is going to render a lot of open space and I need to find something to plant in this area or the weeds will just back you know “Nature abhors a vacuum” and everything. I know the first of August is super late in the year to be planting anything but maybe I’ll stop by some of the nurseries in the area and see if they have any interesting left over from the spring. I would be interested in maybe some egg plants, squashes or some other deciduous plants; even if the plants would no fruit in the relative short time growth time left in this season it would be fun to watch the plants grow. The ground cover would be nice too.

Mark and Jazzy came over to visit last night after I had attacked the weed patch. I had missed seeing Mark the past couple of weeks and was good to catch up with him and Jasmine. It’s unbelievable to see the little girl grow. Her speech is un cannily well developed and her manner were impeccable. The two ended up staying for dinner. We fired up the pit and had steak and hot dogs. Jaz is a girl after my own heart and really got into her hotdog. Mark continues to come over on his day off and mow the yard and work on the back yard. Mark has done wonders this summer and his efforts have made all the difference in the world.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Shoulder Pain and Corn on the Cob

I made a decision this morning when getting out of bed. My shoulder has become sore and the pain seems to have leveled off a bit but clearly the pain will continue until I take some action of one form or another. This pain is similar to the pain I had earlier this year when I did some damage to my left shoulder. I tried to get some physical therapy but could never get any going for a hose of reasons. I am paying for that now. I am still able to dress myself, achieve questionable but productive transfers and do all my ADLs. Something I have painfully noted the last couple of weeks that I am doing, literally hundreds of depression lifts a day. A depression lift is not a lift that leaves a person feeling bad a depression lift is a lift executed by lifting yourself up off your butt by pressing down on your arms on the arms of your wheelchair and by doing do taking the pressure off your butt. This is very important if you are a crip. I realized this morning that I was beginning to let the pain control my life this is not a good sign. So I am going to regain my life. I am going to start a PT regimen. I have tried this before but have failed.

The reason P.T. Has failed for me is finding somewhere I can do the exercises proscribed by the PT. I mean that is all the PT did was give me some colored rubber tubbing and told me to do pull-downs. I just do not have such an environment where I can do this. So, I discussed the issue have no space to workout with Dianne and we're going to try to make such a space. I have one place where I can construct such a place in my computer room. I have a huge rack which stand over 6 feet high. I think I can affix a bar of some kind which will allow me to at least to throw my tubbing over the bar and begin my “PT” regimen: pulling the tube, wrapped round my hand, twenty reps on each side for four sets. I am believing this since a number of years ago I had a very similar issue with my right shoulder and the system worked—so here is hoping.

Yesterday, I did the Farmer's Market. I wanted to get hold of some corn on the cob and see what else might be offered. I dallied round the house, actually I went over to Al and LeNae's and visited for an hour or so but the morning got late and hot and by the time I got to the park many of the “Farmers” were packing their trucks to leave. I found the most righteous table I could find which still had corn on the table. This table was hosted by a young women and her father or some one older. They had been there at the table since 7:00 a.m. They seemed exhausted and wanted to get back to their home in Northern Utah. The corn was “six ears for two dollars and twelve for four.” The corn was fairly beat up and picked over by this time of day but I found 12 pieces—eight for us and four i got for the neighbors. The kind was “Salt and Pepper” corn and excellent. Dianne micro-waved the corn and we had the corn for dinner. The corn was great



Friday, July 28, 2006



Concert aliens wandering round. Blue grass picker further on the left. He actually was pretty good















Beer and wine chick their pavalion is in the back ground.















We did the Thursday Night Concert Series, again, last night down at the Galavin Plaza. Last night the performers were Earl Scruggs and some guy from the Original Byrds. Dianne met me down at the Plaza round 6:00 pm and I shot down there right after work. The temps were in the high 90’s but not really uncomfortable. But the people were strange.

The people! The people who show up to these things are so beautifully strange. These folks truly have to be aliens even the obvious straight beings have to be aliens. Maybe there is a dress code for summer evening concert. Tie-dye skirts, or tops or, tank tops with moppy fly away hair.. Sandals or bare feet or combat boots. Sine the plaza is right down town, a transfer point for all major downtown bus lines and one of the transfer stop for the train there are a lot of street folk too wondering by homeless guys trying to pan handle when they think they are safe from security. The YUPs and YUPPETS are strolling round with beautiful, hair, teeth and boobs. Smiles brighter then the sunset and tans which are works of art. May of the YUPPERS are pushing ergonomically correct three wheeled baby scooters looking just too cool.

I cruise round the area a number of times not fining Dianne right off. Dianne may have had a problem getting away or finding a parking place. Since Earl Scruggs is one of the performers for the night I am not surprised to see banjo pickers and strummers entertaining small groups of folks scattered round the plaza. If a person is into blue grass (I am not) but if they are they would pleasant pleased to hear how good these amatures seem to be. Twanging and yodeling trying their hardest to sound rural; way to much color for me.

We have an hour to kill before the first of the concert are to begin so I suggested we try a local restaurant. I figured given the choice of eating at the Plaza where there are local vendors selling everything from tacos to pizza, shaved ice beer and wine. It’s nice and tasty but usually expensive and awkward. The temps linger in the high 90’s and there is nowhere to sit and enjoy your meal. So we did Asian in a nice air conditioned restaurant.

When we had finished our meal and returned to the Plaza Earl was twanging and hillbilling away. There were way few folks at this concert then the last one we attended. Still the crowds were quite dense round the stage area. We sat on the bench in the shade ate shaved ice and watched people and listened to the music.

The city is mourning right now as we deal with the facts surrounding a lost child found to be murdered and molested. A little girl five years old…now lost for ever. Dianne and I were shocked at how many blonde haired, brightly dressed little hippy kids were wondering round the plaza unattended. I was also astounded at home many twisted, dirty leering bests were wandering round the plaza at the same time. I swear the whole evening was a scene out of a Stephen King novel.




Thursday, July 27, 2006

It's My Blog and I'll Cry If I Want To

I talked with someone yesterday who actually has been following my blog. He does not read the blog every day but drops into the blog every couple of weeks it sounds like. I don’t think he likes my blog, he says “makes me depressed”. He says the blog is too dark he cannot take too much it. Too bad—what is he some kind of an alien? Actually, I enjoyed getting the feed back from him—honest feed back not worried about my feelings. You cannot pay for that kind of feedback. I still have to fall back on my original credo that I typed in the first of these blogs and that is this is MY BLOG and I am going to write in the blog what I want. Again, the reason I started my blog is to have a place where I will write every day and I will sort of BE forced to write every day. The blog has achieved my goal. I am actually doing it and I have written almost every day. I have missed a couple of days…usually weekends but I have written and I have consistently 500 words or more every positing. I know, except yesterday where I did that quote from my buddy Mack Gift’s. Yeah, that was kind of a cope out and that will not happen often.

So what do you all think, all six of you who seem to tune in to this blog fairly regularly? Am I depressed , beyond belief am I beyond hope? Am I bringing you down. Am I forcing you to read this document? No, but I appreciate your stopping bye and reading what every you read or just look at the images I post when I think I have something interesting enough to look at. And you know what I am going to continue doing so—every day I can and usually 500 words…what I am thinking of doing is to start a writing blog as opposed to this journal log where I will try to write as many words with as great a frequency as this blog but have that blogs content reflect my attempts at fiction.. I really want to do this, I mean get a hold of short and longer fiction. I often start but drop the project, I think, because I end up becoming overwhelmed with the length of the project. However, if I get in the habit of whapping out 500 words or more a day all have thousands of words written in no time and maybe complete some of the projects I have started.

So Booo! I hope I did not scare you too much and thanks for letting me scare or depress you today. I do hope I am not whining. I thought blogs started out as a place to bitch, sound off and make your point. Check this blog out and you will see what I mean Peeves . They changed the format about a year ago but still the group posts interesting thoughts bout the stressed they feel each day at work..

Again…thanks for stopping/…keep smiling.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Aliens and such

I just got off the phone with my buddy, a local director of a private-non-profit dealing with mental health. He is a great guy and I love. He’s an aging jazz bone, a cool cat, lo brow hipster(in the good sense). He teaches cops(aliens)to be humans. It’s has been a tough job—some slippage- but I see him exhibiting color again and he laughs and his world moves on. He wrote the following
Toward Some Key Values for the 21st Century

ACCEPTANCE OF DIVERSITY.... It is clear that physical, mental, ethnic, racial, sexual , religious and spiritual diversity are all part of the American experience. Now it is time to recognize how this diversity contributes to the cultural mosaic of our country and to accept one another in all of our differences. It certainly would be a boring world if we were all the same. Acceptance of diversity does not mean acceptance of in-equality. We must do everything in our power to eliminate in-equality in all of its myriad forms.
ECOLOGICAL RESPONSIBILITY.... A new awareness of the interconnectedness of all living things needs to happen. We cannot continue to pretend that our actions have no impact upon the Earth itself. Global warming, destruction of the ozone layer, pollution of the air and water are not the figments of an ecologists imagination. These are worldwide issues that take cooperation from all peoples if they are to be solved. A person with a disability is just as concerned about these issues as anyone else. No one can develop their human potentials in a world destroyed by our own avarice.
GENDER EQUALITY....The philosophy of masculine dominance and control needs to be replaced by total commitment to social, economic, political and institutional equality. This includes people with a disability as well as everyone else. Antiquated and outdated notions about men and women will simply not work in the twenty first century.
NEGOTIATION INSTEAD OF VIOLENCE....In our personal relationships as well as in the relationships between governments, people need to make a commitment to negotiation with "win-win" outcomes and compromise. Further, self-advocates and parent advocates must be willing to express their concerns assertively and clearly.
INVENTING THE FUTURE....It is important that all of our citizenry be involved in an on-going dialogue about directions for the future. Out of these discussions can come temporary consensus. The consensus will constantly evolve in a teleological manner and that is perfectly O.K. It is just consciously understanding the dialectical model of thesis, antithesis and synthesis. An example of this process would be, "The Americans with Disabilities Act". A wonderful piece of legislation. The legislation was the thesis. Resistance to implementation becomes the antithesis and implementation becomes the synthesis which then becomes another thesis.
FULL INCLUSION.... In schools, in society at large, in every institution we must support total inclusion for people with a disability. The time has long since passed when people could be selected out of our society because of physical or cognitive differences. This involves on-going and adaptive advocacy. The latest advances in medicine and assistive technology must be made available to all citizens regardless of their economic status. There cannot be special privileges given to the wealthy at the expense of the ordinary citizen.
WE ARE OUR BROTHERS AND SISTERS KEEPER....There are people all over the world without enough basic necessities to survive let alone explore their potential. It is the obligation of rich nations to help poor developing third world nations to become self-sufficient. Further, we must provide help for people with a disability in developing nations. The chance of birth should not doom children and adults to a lifetime of neglect , pain and poverty.
WE MUST DEVELOP A NEW SENSE OF COMMUNITY....A community based upon two-way communication, more equitable distribution of resources and mutual respect for all of our citizens. This can only happen if we make a commitment to learn how to "listen" to one another.

For more go here http://www.xmission.com/~mhaut/archive.htm#Key%20Values

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Holy Cow !







Holy Cow it’s already 3:30 and I have yet to do something constructive so, if I can get something written and posted the day will not be in vain. Actually today’s loss of productive is typical for the first day back to work following a holiday.


Staff meeting, saying good bye to the boss and then I had a meeting across town and I did not bring my van in today. So, I had to leave the luncheon early and dash and I was surprised to get to the meeting only ten minutes late which was great for motoring across town in my power chair. Then the hilarious thing was I was the only person to have attended. NOT ONE other person showed yup! Not from the able bodied community and especially not from the disabled community! I find that no one person with a disability attended. I ended up having a great and long,one to one conversation with the Americans With Disabilities(ADA)
Coordinator. The ADA guy outlined that he had become bit frustrated with the fact he has tried to canvas the community but no one has shown any interest.

I must admit for a city our size we do have a fairly accessibly transportation system. “Fairly Accessible” does not translate to fully accessible transportation network. The buses are accessible but run on very strange times after 6:00 pm. There is my age old issue of the “mini-high blocks and the UTA Tracks refusal to honor the “Pull up-law and of course the price of the fare continues to rise. The fares may just rise out of reach of consumers so disabled and so poor these folks will be “ERASED” from the community. Now, I am not saying this is not what the authority and it’s board is trying to do but I find the actions continuously suspicious. I am not really mention the fact that non of the cab companies in the community have accessible rides and they got round the law by hiring an ambulance when folks with mobility disabilities need to ride. And hey what about the damn hotels? As I read the ADA if you offer one level of service to one class of people the other classes should have comparable service.

So, I would very much like to see a working committee, independent of the local transit authority, up and running to smooth out some of these bumps in the local fabric of accessible, public transit. I also want the other players at the table, Easter Seals, MS, MDA, Senior Services and Independent Living. The preceding are just the big players in this community but there are many other folks and groups out their I believe would have an interest in these issues. And next, we will revist the issue of accessible and affordable housing. I am also adding some images I took this morning. The time is early morning just before 7:00 am it was a great time for some images of flowers Why are these images here? Because I have dreadfully and sadly neglected images on this blog.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Hot!

I skipped yesterday because I was too hot. I went to swim lessons with Auni—boy was that a weird experience. Then we had to stop in at the “Farmer's Market”. I slip this in quotes because`` our Farmers Market (FM) anything but local farmers. I always have this idea that I am going to find produce grown by my neighbors and other folks who are locals and have garnered enough produce that they want to share it with their other neighbors at a great savings. What you(I) get is trucks just smaller then semi-s from giant farms from all over the state and beyond. Electronic swipe machines, vacuum packed packages and gallons of bottled. The bottled water is ok since the temperature is well over a 100 degrees probably much warmer on the blacktop where the market is held. The prices are high, at least as high as in the local market. The only benefit is that all the produce is in place and maybe if you get there in the closing minutes of the saturday market you actually get some great deals since these “farmers” do not eant to drag their produce home with them and dad left early and the kids ( who were left minding the store or truck bed ) in this case have to problem under selling dad and pocket the cash for the rodeo or what ever farmer kids do for fun...see Footloose.

Anyway by the time we were finished at the FM I was on my way to becoming super heated and once I get the hot I am lost for the rest of the day. Watched Starwars Episode V and blew off the rest of the day. I have been able to get back to my shop thanks to Dianne. The shop is hot though too hot to really enjoy but I got back in the shop and did a couple pieces of work. More to come. I still have not found all my hand tools but I have enough to do most of the projects I am interested. I am headed back out in a few minuted. I drover to Lowes this morning and got some bolts and stuff needed for a project I have been trying to get finished. Ofcourse the store actually had a GREAT sale...one day only !! `and I spent way too much time picked up some items for cheap and felt like a real guy. I tend to get lost in huge arguments with myself trying to justify a purchase. Buying anything for me is a challenge if not debilitating but throw me into a sale with money I am pitiful. I will stare at what I want to purchase for hours, alternating staring at the item or just rolling round the store hoping that when I come back the item will be gone, sold out the door.

Tomorrow is the 24th of July. The 24th is a major holiday in this State. I am, of course, off from work. I don't have a lot planned just want to enjoy the day and time away from the office.



Friday, July 21, 2006

Here We Go Again

I had lunch today with my fabulously arty Lori B. Now Lori you might recall go back ,probably, decades now. Lori has a major disability (CP) but she has made a minor life path in the arts. Lori has been the editor of writers with disability anthology. She has also been part of an actors group called the 2nd West Acting Company. I was part of that group and though I did not have the commitment that Lori does I would like to see her continue her dream of living, breathing and working somewhere in the art trade. When Lori has an idea these days she always pulls me in on the idea, one to see if I think her idea has merit and two to see how I might be part of the project so I am somewhat guarded every time she calls and wants to do lunch.

The past couple of years Lori has been employed, half heartedly, at a local private non-profit group. She was hired with “soft money”. There seems to little “hard money” anymore so lots of folks are hired under very squishy grants as was Lori. Well, that grant is about squished out and she is being let go and she will soon be back into the job market which I feel would be a very scary place for a women in her late forties with CP. I know how I would feel being a guy in his mid 50’s with spinal cord injury. But Lori has an idea—it’s not a new idea we have kicked it round a lot in the past couple of years. The idea will not die though and maybe now it the idea’s time. Currently the community of people with disabilities in this town seems to be experiencing some major change. The last big shake up in the community was a little over five years ago. The money may not be any harder now then it was then but maybe there might be more. I don’t see the niche Lorie wants to fill being addressed at this point in time. She just needs to work part time, I guess to retain benefits and cover rent. Lori could do it.

We had an idea not long ago to develop a writer’s sanctuary. A place sort of like a co-op where there would be a place where writers could go and have access to a physical space and what ever supports they might need to write. The sanctuary or co-op would have access to professional writers, workshops, a cell or individual writing area : word processor, printer. Public events like readings, work signings, and possibly even forums. And possibly an yearly anthology made up of the works from the Co-op. I have moved on from this idea. I had a romantic notion that if a person had a place to go that was just for writing maybe that person, (me) would write more! I was hoping we would be able to secure an older building on the Eastside of town. There’s a lot of property that is sitting empty right now some City and State buildings. If we could get one we would be on our way. I think this is a great idea but when I started thinking of living the idea I began to waver. I like being home too much. I just do not have the hermatic drive to lock myself away and write. I guess IF I am going to write I am going to write at home. I believe in the writers co-op to the point that I may consider sitting on the or a board of directors if it ever gets to a private non-profit status.

So here we go again Lori has an idea so just sit back and see what grows.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

In The Dragons Lair

In The Dragon’s Lair

One of the responsibilities of my position is to give presentations to different agency and programs round the State to instruct key individuals about our program in the hope that these managers will send more phone calls our way. This light duty except one has to travel and I was traveling today. Not far, thank goodness , but I was required to saddle up in the van and drive wet to the Deaf Center where the State Administrator’s Meeting(SAM). These meeting are held once a quarter and I try to get out to at least one of these meeting a year. I have always found the amount of turnover in this State agency is staggering. So even if we do the SAM once a year we are basically contact brand new folks. I gave a 15 minute presentation and then passed out brochures and left.

I am pretty foggy today, I did not sleep well last night—so I think the presentation could have been better but I paid attention to the audience and saw lots of head nodding and smiles but that could have just been the sugar rush the audience had from their “Continental Breakfast.” Doughnuts and coffee—in this case orange juice. I was given twenty minutes for the presentation but just petered out after 10-15 minutes. I usually take every minute allowed and more if I given more but not today.

As I age I can sense a fair amount of mellowing, I suppose this mellowing is natural. The agency I was presenting to this morning was my arch enemy when I worked in a private non-profit when I first migrated to this State. This agency was draconian and counter productive to the consumers they “served”. In fact this agency had a history of trying to conquer and divide the agency I was working for. This happened soon after I left the program. I don’t think I had any bearing of when the non-profit fell but my leaving could, have… Now there are similar programs through out the State and they all do great work but they all toil under dark flag. Actually things maybe changing; the agency recently retired its long time squinty director—a manager who seemed cold, heartless and one who pinched a dollar long an hard. New air now blows in this bureaucracy and I am holding my breath in hopes of better services and programs for people with disabilities. So, if this hope a sign of my mellowing? One person does not make a regime and there are plenty of hench guys and gals still running round from the old regime. But I hold a lot of hope for the new guy. I believe he is the one who can make the difference. Change in an organization of this size well take years. I don’t know if the private non-profits I spoke of well ever get back to their IL routes they are way compromised and philosophically challenged.

Thanks for reading I hope this makes more sense tomorrow.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Just be patient.

I drove into the office because I have a meeting at 3:30 and I did not want to risk and problems because I would have had to leave earlier due to having to take public transit across town. I am just going to keep my head down and make as few waves as possible until this period of high anxiety passes. Tomorrow morning at 9:00 I am meeting with the State wide Area Managers meeting for a State office and I will be using the van again for that meeting. So I am already becoming hyper-vigilant as to covering my butt. Now, maybe I am just whistling in the dark but I know systems and when something like the “Memo” comes down there is an immediate change but also following the change there is an almost immediate regression back to the status quo, slow almost imperceptible at first but an eventual return to status. Now, true things may not return to exactly how things were and there maybe some permanent change in the direction of the manifesto but by in large things stay the same.

My theory is that people are lazy for the most part—even though when in power these folks want to see change, bring about change but few have the physical and mental stamina to see this change through to the point of incorporation. Just like parents. Parents always hate things as things are and seem to always seeking change (many times at the expense of the kids) like say watching TV after 9:00 PM on a school night. Now, the parent has to be home after such an edict to enforce it or the parent HAS to be the one who at 9:00 gets him/her self from the EX chair and turn off the system, many times battling family members. Eventually the parent just is worn down and slippage to the status quo begins.

Actually as I have reread the memo—there is nothing in the memo that we are not already doing except the office check out and check in stuff. I have been in other regimes where this was the policy and have done OK. Right now, there is not even a system set up to even check out on unless one just leaves message with the front desk folks—and I usually do this anyway. Other area of the memo have little to do with me (like going to the district office) I NEVER GO THERE AND NEVER WANT TO. The district office is evil always has been nothing but bad karma there. So this is a non issue.

Am I too focused on the changes at the office…do you all want me to move on to new areas of concern? I will try to let this go but I am afraid this whole things is just boiling up way too much stuff to write about. I will try to get some more images up on the blog and try to cover some new territory. Just be patient and we will all get over this bump in the road.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Running in Place

There a great film they show to students in Psychology 101 classes. The film how power corrupts. They take a hundred or students from a general intro class and then arbitrarily set part of the class over the rest of the class and the film shows how the power changes the students the exact same student as those who were not selected to be in power. The Ober-students begin to pressure and exert or try to exert their control over their fellow students. This film has become a classic because the subject matter is so clearly stated and so clearly human.

We got the first message from the new regime today; tpical establishing of power. It’s all very clear, times of services, no kids in the office a major change, changing phone message daily. Hard core times in and out, implementation of a Sign out board and time stamped mail and all mail opened and stamped by reception. These came down as a written memo! Not any of that email stuff and hand delivered I am surprised we did not have to sign for the memo. Actually as odd as this looks and feels it’s all good. At least we know where we stand and we have something to hold to and to measure our daily movement. I guess to a degrees this is good business and there has been a good deal of laxness over the years.

And you cannot help it. The ID is a friend of mine we share many ideas and thoughts but we had done that as equals now she is THE BOSS. Sorry to say this makes all the difference. I shall try to make this not the case but I can tell you from my experience this is next to impossible. Oh you can still be friends but only to a degree. You can have a beer with them after work, even have them for dinner, BBQ or what ever there is a definite line which has been drawn and crossing this line becomes lethal in the mind of the subordinate. I just hate to see this behavior and more I hate to exhibit it. I hate always looking over my shoulder or having a ready excuse for incase I am interrogated for one thing or another.

But I envision this regime as a fairly benevolent regime. I will be surprised how strongly the memo will be enforced—actually I suspicion that a large part of the memo is aimed at specific personal. I expect there to be some blood letting as we move on and bounders changed, challenged and reformed. Really, I am just now beginning to “pace” myself for the long run and I would encourage staff to do the same. This is just “interim” we still have to interview for the “new’ director and should the new director be different then the Interim then we are going to be in for the whole thing again just from a newer boss. So, here I am just running in place, building my endurance and getting ready for the long run.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Well it has started

Well, it has started. The Interim Director(ID) has taken the reigns and the changes are beginning. We had an extended staff meeting this morning to start ironing out then issues this small office is experiencing. There was some good suggestions and some interesting suggestions. I just kept repeating my work mantra :’Bend grasshopper, bend in the winds of change regardless of how brisk the winds might be.” You know how you listen for things—even if you aren’t listening for things? The item which sort of jumped out at me among the many items which was hopping round the discussion floor was the ID would be going over Job descriptions! What does this mean?? I sensed immediate red flares. We just finished our Annual Reviews and we will be doing them again. We labored, for what seemed hours just on who is going to answer the phones and when lunch hours well be. I bent in that wind but I am watching the weather closely so I can keep abreast of what fronts might blow in.

I donot know why but people seem to tell me everything even if I do not wish to hear it. What I have heard so far there maybe a conspiracy going on “right here in River city”. I am torn the ID is a personal friend of mine—so are the conspirators. If I donot say anything does that make me a conspirator by association or default. Hey, I just want a job, a T-1 connection and a view of the dumpster…oh yeah and benefits. It seems there is one “player’ in the office who seems to be an inflammatory point to office folk and some folk on the “outside” Of course when we had the staff meeting to bring out these issues and address them the employee who seems to be a major part of the problem is out of the office for possibly the week.( This is a clear example of why I don’t take vacation anymore then I have to. It’s too easy to get killed in the crossfire when you are not even at work. What’s really weird is this person is busy scurrying round the community agitating the Council against the ID…nothing good is going to come from this. I get dark feelings.

Then one of my fellow employees drops by the office and goes on and on about how my facial expressions during Staff Meeting were hilarious and how I better watch out or these expressions are going to get into a world of hurt. I am not sure what the person was talking about but I have better watch myself. I know myself enough to know I can have a pretty vicious cynical side if I let myself go. I checked this out with my immediate partner in the next office and one I trust probably more then anyone else and she said thought I was OK and indicated the other is a bit of a trouble maker anyway. Still, I had better keep my wits about me.
We are officially in the triple digits according to my Weatherbug thermometer in the corner of my computer…101 degrees but seem like the heat inside is just getting started.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

In the the Blink of an Eye


I woke this morning with a nagging feeling I should remember something but I could not place that something just at the fringe of my memory. It was a little later when I was at my sink shaving and I noticed the calendar behind me in the mirror. I was thinking of the week to come and glanced at the calendar concentrating as I reversed then numbers in my head and saw today was the 16th of July. July 16th?, JULY 16TH!! This is the day, the very day forty years ago that I broke my neck.

I was 15 years old and I had “stolen” my older brothers motorcycle for the day. He had a little 80CC Yamaha and i had a smaller 55cc so do the math. More CC= more speed. I had learned to turn on his bike with a metal finger nail file. I did this as often as I could. He was out of the state spending the summer with my older brother in North Carolina; so essentially I “owned” his bike. I am still quite surprised my parents allowed me to do this. They had to know what I was doing. But, I was keeping the bike filled with gas and keeping out of their hair—I loved the Sixties.


I had a summer job cutting grass and I had just started my first “real” job at a KFC in Boise, Idaho one of my friends had gotten me. It was my third day on the job and I was planning on going to KFC as soon as I had finished the lawn and raced home and got into my cook's whites. I hate shoes, but you all know that, and so I had my shoes off cutting the grass as I usually did. My feet were green by the end of the day's job. I noticed then when I got home and jumped out of my cutoffs and pulled on my only pair of white levis and pulled on my converses and white shirt and I was off. What i still remember was that I felt good, the sun blasting through my hair hurtling down the road at 35 mph. I had even rigged a small transistor radio onto the handle bars and could hear the music if I was lucky. This day I was lucky or so I thought. I was hearing the music loud and clear. In fact, I remember Red Rubber Ball was playing when I came to the stop sign at the intersection of Boise Avenue and Broadway. The last sight I remember is the sun reflecting off what must have been a windshield a distance down the Broadway. I figured I had enough time to get across the street. Now the 80 Yamaha's gear sequencing is different then the 55 Yamaha's. I can only figure that I placed the motorcycle in to second or third gear rather then first. The bike must have chugged out to the middle of the intersection and '”flooded out”. I can imagine myself fiddling with the gears trying to reach “Neutral” and allowing me to start the bike and finish crossing the intersection....the car was driven by an old man going faster then he should. He hit me broadside, I flew into the windshield breaking my skull and instantly braking my neck. I would never walk again,make a fist or walk on my hands. But, I have had a great life, wife and wonderfully brilliant, and supportive kids and now grand kids. I work, I drive I ride the train and own half a mortgage. I weigh more then I should and love my life. Happy Anniversary


Friday, July 14, 2006

Today, I Caved

The Sheriffs department never showed up, at least not yesterday like they said they were. This does not mean they won't but I feel I am ready for who ever THEY are if they do show up and want the donation. I figured you all would want to know what happened.

I caved today. I have a regular meeting every two months, its a lunch meeting and I try to work it out so I have enough comp time earned so I do not have to come back to the office. This has been a busy week—the boss is finally gone. Today should have been her last day but she is working an extra pay period so she will have insurance coverage to last her her trip to N.J. I ended up working through a couple of lunches and I had the Russians on Wednesday night. I think giving me more then enough comp-time to take the afternoon off.. This morning I was banking on to be a typical quiet Friday but at 9:30 the boss emails me that she is writing her last report for the office and needs me to supply some information for then report. I am completely caught off guard so I whip out 500 or 600 words and send them to her via email w/ attachment. By that time I was running about a half hour late. I did not bring my van in today so I am at the mercy of public transit. So only telling my partner I zoom out of the office. I kinda suggested I would be back to other office folk. Of course CC, my office mate, always encourages me to “not come back”. I really she loves it when I am gone. CC said she had the phones covered and I would be OK. So, I caved, I did not return to the office after the meeting. I did call to see if any trauma had resulted and there was none so I was gone. I am hoping that by Monday the boss( who is in one day for her farewell lunch) will have forgot everything. She then is gone for a week on vacation and then she will be gone for good.

It's hot today, I am sure the temp was will over 100 degrees out on the tarmac. I was smart enough to wear my hat today—with no hair i have to wear a cap of some sort or I am sure to get heat stroke at least. I was going to put one of the bottles of water we keep for Council member into the freezer to keep with me on the road but I forgot in this morning's stress. I must start carrying water, frozen or other wise. This could save my life. It looks like it going to be hot for the next week or so. I love these days, little clothes as possible and reading my favorite books. I hope you all are enjoying your summer—Fall is but a whisper on the horizon. Have a great weekend.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Scam or Shake Down, You Decide

Scam or Shake Down You Decide

Yesterday morning I was minding my own business and I get this call from some officer so and so  from the  Salt Lake Sheriff’s office! Took me off guard, after all this is the cops, you always want to hear what THEY have to say. Who ever the caller was he had a very authorative voice and launched into a song and dance about there were raising funds to purchase school clothes for kids. It took  a couple seconds to register that the call was a solicitory  ( I am just making up words every where) call. which is actually against the law to do to State workers.  In fact I usually just hang up on the caller once I realize they are just grubbing for money. The caller actually asked for $200.00 ( to be sure they got the kid everything the kids needs for school).  I finally broke in and said all I could, possibly do is $50.00 which the caller “jumped” on.  I asked the caller who I should make the check out to.  The caller gave me the name but no address. I was waiting for the address when the caller advised me not to worry about the address they would be round to collect the check.  I thought this weird when he said this but I just accepted it. Later as I mulled over the incident I began to think it odd—unless they did not have an address to and it too.  The more I pondered the call the weirder it seemed. I have discussed the call with two workers here in the office and they both think the thing is a scam. I do not know the incident just feels weird.
$50.00!  Fifty buckroos is a lot of money. I am sure the  cause is great but what is wrong with the D.I. or Salvation Army—it’s where I go. Seriously, I would have hung up on the scammer if I were not so intimidated.  I even called the sheriff’s office this morning and they did not know anything about the operation. The officer I spoke with said there maybe project their auxiliary group might be running but I did not have the time to follow up with them. I think it odd that the auxiliary would not notify the regular operation what they were up to.

What was even stranger in the course of twenty minutes after the call from the sheriff’s office I got two more calls from two more private non-profit agencies asking for money!  My name must have been sold to some list of some kind.

Now I have to figure out what I do if “they” show up for their check..  My partner here says tell them I just cannot do it. I don’t have the funds. My other workmate says just tell them “I rethought the situation and have decided against making the donation.” I don’t owe them an explanation . I don’t owe them anything.  They were out of line doing the phone thing anyway. I donot even think they are legit and if they are legit they run their operation in the “shade”.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

The Discomfort of Change

The Discomfort of Change or the Bump in My Summer Road

My Partner here at the office has been going through some major transition issues with the new “front desk” person. Age differences, poor job description issues and even possible some race issues , I believe, all have had parts to play with the turf battle which has been ongoing now for three or four months. So far I have been able to remain comfortably distant from “ground zero”. I just listen nod my head and give advice when and if advice is called for. Bottom line there has been an executive director in place and Is ere this her territory. How ever that executive director is so short not she is all but invisible with her last day being next Monday. Each day the director has been less and less in the office. Essentially the director is but marking time at this point. The Interim director is beginning to take hold and beginning to flex her muscles. Well, my partner is no dummy. She all about hostile work environment, harassment and even discrimination . My partner knows how to document and how to make a case in front the EEOC if she has to.
My partner has cornered the Interim director a number of times making her case this morning being one of those times. Not long after the meeting my partner and interim director(ID) wound up in my office with a plan for more funding that our office must initiate my next month. This is OK, I understand the need for an office like mine to make sure our funding issues are covered first and foremost. However, the plan described. I know is going to cause all kinds of fur to fly in this small office.

Now the ID may or may not end up being the permanent the Executive Director of this office either way I am ok. She is a personal friend of mine, we share a lot of the same ideas as far as services and programs for people with disabilities. She is global, she is a great idea person but sometimes lacks the focus needed to bring great ideas to fruition. I worry a little the new relationship we are currently forging may be damaged in “heat of creation” but as ”they” say she is the boss and I will start culling numbers and data and putting together charts and diagrams showing how great this is office is what we can do for “you” the ubiquitous “you”. I will put together a presentation I can take “on th road’ to those directors whose operation’s contract out with our little I&R. I am sure the end result will be major opportunities for personal growth and, really, what’s wrong with that?

So, in all honesty I am feeling just a little bit threatened. I will survive, I always do. I know the discomfort of change is fleeting and (in many cases) necessary for growth. I know that I have been through the cauldron enough times…I was just hoping for less heat this summer of my fifty-fifth year.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Big Day

Today’s the big day at work. People are going to be traipsing through the office all day long. My office leads of the party with my quarterly board meeting. Next is the Executive Committee for the larger organization with whom we share the office. Then later it’s what I am calling the “end game”. Staff at the Developmental Council is having a farewell Tea for the boss—a space and time where people in the local industry can come by and pay their respects to the going director. It’s going to be a full day---I gotta go.

I survived another board meeting! It’s over, done , fini…The board was in this morning for my quarterly board meeting. Our numbers are down but we reported and the folks seemed OK with the results if not pleased with the colored graphs or pie charts, colored materials adds a great deal to any meeting especially a board meeting. We even had a decent turn out and those who were here asked poignant and durable questions and gave sterling advice on what we, as an information line might do to better assist their individual and supporting agency. We run a quick tight meeting. We rarely go over an hour cover all the bases serve candy, never fruit or bagels and lots of color and get the players out of the door. Now I need to cobbler together minutes from this meeting and send the minutes and the other hand outs to the board members who did not show and then I am basically done until next meeting which is the first Tuesday.

Executive committee is the organization al group that guides or leads the larger body of the developmental disability Council. The group meets a couple of weeks ahead of the council and supposedly irons out the agenda and topics they plan to cover in the meeting. The meeting is fairly dossal behind closed doors. I was surprised when a thunder storm of noise came from the room, I tried to understand what was going on but could not make anything definitive out. I think this is shades of things to come to this cozy little office.

This week is the bosses last week and today is the openhouse, the special time when the public can show up pay their respects and get something to eat. Looks like small sandwiches cheese cubes, assorted vegetables and new this year is white chocolate covered strawberries. A small presentation of the engraved vase, a few tears and the opening of the chowline. Many of the consumers we serve of course are DD and many where here to pay their respects and to eat. They ate and ate and even that the caterer made too many finger sandwiches and vetagbles. Now, staff is bagging the leftovers and sending the leftovers home with the consumers, who are savvy enough to now if they wait round long enough they will what is left over. So there are some pretty faces leaving with bags of all the above.

The open house is essentially a living funeral. There are folks from private non profits from all over the valley coming to bid my boss goodbye. Folks from State government and private industry who in some way has been touched by the director and which her well. She stand in the reception line, with her family, shakes hands and gives hugs and watches the clock. She leaves town in less then a week to begin her new life.

Monday, July 10, 2006

The Wall


I may discussed this before but my office is in the rear of the building and my offices back wall is also the outside wall of the building. The building itself sits at the bottom of a sloping parking lot, this means any measurable participation, whether rain or snow tends to “pool” at the base of this building. Over the three or so years I have been here there has been many snow and rain storms and a lot of water has puddle against the wall. Well, the water seeped through wall and soaked a lot of the base board. Add the wet wall along comes me in my power wheelchair

I keep an old manual wheelchair in my office which I transfer into in the morning when I get to work. In order to transfer safely from one chair to the other I brace my manual chair against my wood desk and pin the chair there with my power chair. To do this I wedge my power chair between the and the manual chair. Over the years I have brushes against this “wet” wall enough to begin caving in the wall and I mean caving in the wall. I think I have been able to keep the cavity hidden with either of the chairs. I have made sure that one wheelchair is always in front the whole at all times. Last week I guess I was found out when there was so much white plaster from the wall on my wheels that the building followed the tracks back to my office. Friday as I was preparing to live for the weekend the building engineer came by my office with a tradesman whom I assumed worked drywall from the amount of pointing at the hole in the wall. The two worked, and talked around me—I was once again, invisible. Which is just fine with me, at least they were not pointing fingers at me.
This morning when I came into my office the hole was gone. Patched, beautifully patched. There was all kinds of tools strewn all over my office and still is for that matter. The only thing I can think is the dry waller will come back this evening and work on the wall some more. I appreciate the repair and I also appreciate not being drug down into a “who broke the wall investigation”. I am just wondering how long this “Fix’ is going to last before the rains come or I ram the wall unintentionally and the process starts all over. I need to figure a less destructive way of accessing my manual wheelchair.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Patience,Patience, Patience





I hate it. I am so irresponsible I cannot stand it. For the past four or five weeks I have been trying to locate my camera transformer. I have an older DVD digital camera and I have used it a couple of times but never as much as I have in-light of the amount of money I spent on the camera. I did the obligatory video of the grand kids, nephew's baseball games and maybe one or two reunions. I did a couple of music videos and even posted a couple to` my Myspace account. Even a couple personal flicks just to see but then every thing the n dies off as interest waned. I realized that I really had just a “play camera” and not the software I really needed to make movies or documentaries, which I am really interested in. Then there was the editing which would have to be done: time and patience I beginning to doubt that I have. I went through the same mania when I first got in to web page building. I even got an account that I still maintain today. I like web paging once I get into it but getting there is sorta of a drag. I had such big dreams to start out though.

Now, I have some ideas I really want to consider but no way to really do the project. What is perhaps what is drive me the most insane is that I know the piece of equipment I need is here in the house somewhere. I mean our house is only so large, there is only so many places the device could be; add in the fact that, me being in a wheelchair limits the possibilities even further. I remember five of six months ago I had a similar drive to be creative and I DID find all the pieces I needed( except the software). I remember thinking ' Ha, I'll plug the cord in and just live the end exposed where the end would be accessible and I would just have to plug the camera in when it needed charged' Seems that I also wanted the cord close to one of the computers so I would have ready access to the system when I wanted to download. The piece has to be round here somewhere but where? What I need to do is borrow on of my kids who is nimble and strong enough to move heavy and awkward items to be able to look behind and under things. Then and there I will find the transformer.

There is another option to consider: start searching the network for either a new or used component. The cost cannot be that much can it? Ebay, or Yahoo auctions maybe useful. But, then it' the time factor. I will not be filming with the camera today and that is for sure. Patience, patience, patience maybe this is what this exercise is all about. Ok, I am up to the challenge.

Friday, July 07, 2006

InterDimensionalTransit-Flux or Miracle







I had just boarded the train for my South bound trip home last night. The boarding process was bit difficult because the biggest Jazzy I had ever seen. The jumbo driving the Jazzy had it kinda wedged half way in the designated seating area and the center aisle. This was cool, I worked my way round him and we were OK. Well the very next stop the second largest Jazzy I have ever encountered with a similar big boy driving it (these guys are even bigger then I am) I wish I had got images of these guys and their powerchair but I obviously did not have enough pixels. So, Big Boy number two waddles his chair on board. The Big Boy number one is trying to wiggle chair out of the way so I have enough room to slide by him and make more room behind me. Big Boy number Two for some stupid reason started pushing me from the rear and side and this caused me to advance pushing my foot into BB#1 he tries to move even more and pries me into the metal stanchion in doing so caught my hand control cable between the metal on my chair metal on the stanchion causing the sharp end of the stanchion to lacerate and sever the cable in a magnificent rooster tail of blue sparks and smoke. I was dead on the train.


When ever something like this happens I go into this zombie mode where I get into one routine and do the routine over and over again in hopes that something I do will have a positive outcome. In this case I sat there turning the chair on and off and each time I would get the same result a row of flashing lights from my hand control, indicating something was dreadfully wrong with the over-all unit.

Evan, my buddy, was riding the train last night and Evan hardly rides the train anymore since he has been taking a bus which runs a better time schedule and gets him closer to his home then the Train does. But tonight of all nights, Evan missed his regular bus forcing him to take the train. I am driving three block, into the city now, to catch my train. This trip take awhile longer but the scenery is better and seems there are more opportunities for adventure. Evan is one interesting guy and I will write about Evan one day but not today. I was able to call Dianne from the train who came to meet at the station with my wheelchair van. I instructed Evan how to disengage the clutches of the power chair which allow the power chair to free wheel allowing me or the power chair to be pushed. Evan elected to stay with me, eve though his wife had already left their home to pick him up at his own station, one more down the track from mine.

Dianne was just pulling into the parking area of my train station as we were pulling in. I told Evan he should stay on the train because Dianne could probably take it from here and push me to the van and home. Evan being the gentle man he is would not hear of such talk and pushed me all the way from the ramp to the lift Dianne had already deployed. When I was secure Evan went on hid way and we on our way. Of course this incident happened at 5:55pm and all the technical support options have closed for the day. My brother Carl lives a few blocks from ours and he has been great in keeping me and my wheelchairs going—this is yet another story too. Now, my brother is a husband, a very involved grandfather and church member so there is hardly a time that Carl is not busy. Tonight, however, his wife is off tending grandkids and Carl has the time to spend with my chair. We sat in our van an hour while Carl looked at any options to get the chair operational.

The cable is actually six smaller wires wrapped into one cable. One of the center was wires was nearly vaporized by the power surge. There was nothing of the wire to splice the wire was turning to powder everywhere Carl touched: bottom lime, they chair was not going anywhere again under it’s own power until a new cable could be installed.

Dianne dropped me off at work this morning and went over to Magic Rest and dropped the chair off there. They had the chair up and running an hour later. They replaced the cable and now the chair seems to work just dandy. I was expecting far worse, just $150.00—that is not bad. Had I fried the mother board( which is pretty common in power surges such as this), or burned out the controller then we could be talking about thousands of dollars . In fact I gave myself a limit: if the repair was going to be more the $500.00 for get it. I was going to purchase one of the used models off my website for $500.00. The main control Board could still be affected and I am going to take the unit in for a full evaluation (tune up $75.00) next week. I have heard of too many tales when a program board, after being exposed to a power surge of one sort or another could and would engage itself independent of the driver and just drive, uncontrollably away. This is all I would need while sitting on the platform when waiting fore the train.

Now the events surrounding this incident were miraculous, minimally miraculous, maybe a type two or type three miracle. Not a sea splitting, rising from the dead, complete remission type miracle but just a common everyday garden variety miracle wrought by one person’s goodness to another.

PS: Then this noon I took Dianne to lunch at the Mall across the street and there was BB#1 sitting in the food court grazing!! I could not believe it. The worst part is that I had left my cam,era in my office becaus i figured I would not have anything to capture. when will I learn?


Thursday, July 06, 2006

Holidays Remorse

Holiday’s Remorse

Sometimes I think I would happily forgo holiday in order to be functional in the holiday’s week. I have been fighting off sleep all afternoon. I even went to bed earlier then usual last night but today I am still sleeping in from of my computer screen. The time off for the holiday seems nice but this is horrible. I have nodded off twice today. Luckily no one has walked on me …yet.

So I have to keep busy. I am working on the quarterly report for my Advisory Board Meeting I have this coming Tuesday. Of course, as to tradition, the damn software I am plagued to use to develop the reports I need does not work. I cannot get a hold of the honcho who developed the software and understands it best. In order to get to Juan I have to go though Leonardo. Leonardo is the slick ( car sales men clone)suite who fronts the software to the public. Leonardo likes to think he is the all knowing geek who can answer your hard core, geek questions but Leonardo usually has to default Juan. Juan saunters in looks at the problem does a quick evaluation and does his magic and you are on your way again crunching numbers, developing your reports and over all looking good. But, none of that today leaving me with the feeling I could have had this issue resolved if only I had not taken the Third or Fourth of July off . One day left in this week and Monday we should be able to hone a report which will get us past the board.
Actually CC, my partner here in this office is fantastic. We use a piece of software called WebTrend. WebTrends is one of those all purpose pieces of software which constantly measures activity on your website. We only started using the Webtrends as reporting tool to Advisory Board in the last year when our calls continued to look so dismal. Where our call per month may have sank as low as 250 calls the hits to our website is a strong, or looks strong, 30,000+ hits. Everyone seems to be impressed but me. Is this the old razzle dazzle . The people who sit on our board or for the most part people who have been assigned this task so the Director will not have to waste his precious time with us one hour every quarter. I know a lot of these hits are from people bored and just out surfin net the NET. The one board member who is savvy enough to understand is a real friend to our organization, one who wishes d\for us to succeed and to grow. He is a university professor type, a think tank type one who knows how to bend the universe into separate realities through the power of statistics. Marty is a good person, who follow the principals of White magic—Marty is far from the Dark side and yet walks in light.

We have two working days and a whole weekend to polish the numbers ( however small) so bright these numbers will blind those who seek to quibble and bibble our good works.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

I should be Dead






Figure 1 Another view, the truck was coming toward the picture taker down that street and turned to the right on this street as I was crossing the street. The truck’s path is the yellow line and my path is the dotted blue.



Right now, this very second I should not be here in my office on this cloudy July 5th morning I should be dead. If there are parallel universes-or life-lines then I saw where mine most likely met and split off into an alternate reality.

I was cruising for the train and the South bound Trax had just entered station and the crossing arms were down and the bells and lights on the crossing arms were lashing and ringing. Traffic as expected was stopped. I was headed East bound. There were a couple of trucks at the stop sign. I decided to cut between the two vehicles at the stop sign. I figured I was totally safe since all traffic motion was stopped by the crossing guards being down. What I did not factor in to this equation as traffic coming East Bound on 6400 South and turning North just BEFORE the crossing guards. Any way, I digress, so I figure that it’s safe and I cut across the first lane where the trucks are waiting and I entered the North bound lane of 300 West street. I could not and did not even try--in all honesty- to see if there was traffic coming. I figured everyone was stopped. Bare in mind that I am just one vehicle down from the stop sign… I am probably less then twenty feet from the intersection when I see I truck come off of 6400 south out of the West making a Left hand turn onto 300 West right in to the lane I am crossing. I actually had one of those slow-motion moments. I could see clearly, and I could sense clearly what was happening. I was not frightened, for some reason, I just new my number was up and thought to my self: How stupid are you?!!!! I have pontificated more than once when reading the obituaries “That’s how stupid die!” or “There is another example of people dying stupidly.” And I was thinking ‘and now you, YOU are one.’. I saw everything. The plaid work shirt the guy was wearing. The driver's non-expression as he saw me in the roadway. I thought it odd that he did not do the “crazy face” panic thing, slamming on his brakes and swerving or trying to swerve out of the way. At least I do no remember any such thing. What I do remember he just expressionlessly stopped his truck—no jerking of the truck or screeching tires. The truck just magically came to a stop and I scurried out of the way to the side of the road. I remember looking
the driver right in the eye and uttering an appropriate expletive more at myself than at the driver—the driver did not even acknowledge this, he just sort of kept staring ahead. He dropped the truck in gear and drove on—it felt like a moment the two hit men had in Pulp Fiction when their victim unloads a magazine full of ammo into them and they are not touched by a single round.

Now, I am not saying this was a miracle and I have been round miracles, heck, I AM a miracle but this did not feel like a miracle. Miracles definitely have their own feeling. But it was something. What I did feel was like I was at some sort of crossroad a point of divergence. Two realities merged here maybe more for a split second and in one of those timelines I was killed or maimed beyond comprehension. In an other the truck driver stopped and yet in another I never crossed the road but some how I believe one changed with another with the favorable result that I am here writing this post this afternoon. Whatever happened should not have happened –should have or shouldn’t have I am glad that it did.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Happy B-Day USA

Last night Dianne and I chased firework displays for maybe half an hour. The plan was to take in one of the firework display last night so we could sleep in this morning since I have work tomorrow bright and early and did not think staying up late tonight would be a very good idea I looked in the paper yesterday morning to see who would be launching fireworks that evening. The place I found was in Magna a very small city about 15 miles west of us. The drive is close if we take the Interstate.

Magna was having a fair at the same time so we figured we would go to the fair and hang out until it was time to watch the fireworks. The evening was warm and traffic light as we cruised West. The fair was cute but very small town. Going to the fair was taking a trip in a time machine. The crowd was sparse when we got there. In fact we had a difficult getting to the fair. There was not any curb cuts and I eventually went a couple blocks until we found a driveway which could allow me access to the fair proper.( I am going to write a letter to Magna city to insist they begin thinking of building some access to this park.). I gritted my teeth as I back tracked to Dianne. The midway sported five or six rides—mainly kiddie rides, small roller coaster, Zipper and sledge hammer. Two food booths, or rather cotton candy, caramel apples and snowcones. One of the stands also offered corn dogs we had one each. You whatv the place looked like? It looked like a movie set. Like a movie about small town America—something out of a Stephen King movie. There was even a small stage set off from the midway of local talent very local talent. Bad as the talent was it was cute, these guys has enough gumption to get out and preform. We found that the fireworks was for tonight and the paper had it wrong. It was getting dark and we decided to make a run for it and try to find a fireworks show. It was ten o clock and most of the shows launch about that time. Dianne was driving fiercely and I was beginning to see color eruptions in the Southern Sky. We drove ans drove and finally decided to pull over and see what we could see. The fireworks were launching all over the valley. We were too far away to see anything clearly but we were happy to be motivated enough to be out and and enjoying each other.

It was late when we got back and we ended up reading for another hour before we finally felt enough “unwound” to get to sleep. Today we had the morning heat and more moisture pushed in and by mid afternoon we were having thundershowers. We had also a granddaughter by then who needed some time out from her house. So, Auni and Dianne played and cooked and had a good time. I worked on the

computer awhile and just enjoyed my time off. Tomorrow I am back at the office for a short week prepping for my quarterly Advisory meeting. Happy 4th Everyone.



Monday, July 03, 2006

Barbeques and Bathtubs





Monday morning and here I my laptop , at home waiting for the repair guy from Sears to arrive to tell me that he will have to reschedule to to come back when he will have the part he need to do the actual repair. I just know that is going to happen, it is what has happened every time I have taking my annual leave to sit home while the repair guy comes. I kinda wanted to work today. I did this big production is the staff meeting the decided who would be working the pre and post holiday work schedule since people try to wring out as much time as possible from their holidays.

Now get this .you will not even read this post till I get back to work possibly as far away as Wednesday. I did something to home system on Saturday and I lost my connection to the Net! The season being Summer and all, I have been kept busy outside doing yard work, garage work, being a good neighbor. So withdrawal over the weekend has not been too bad. Now, however, I must get my connection so i can post, check my back statements and just “zoom the Net”. I decided after missing the post for yesterday that I would go ahead and write the posts and worst case scenario: I will just post from the office. But hopefully I can get back on line today.

So far my Fourth of July vacation has been great. We have just been doing maintenance around the house, a little grandkid duty but not too bad and on Friday we went to the Concert in the Park series: music from Polynesia. The concert was hokey with , mainly ancients sitting round the park amphitheater in folding lawn chairs and fat people on grass grazing on popcorn and snow cones, some enterprising local came to vend. Cute girls, lots of hula and hand movement and people grazing. We took Auni, who loved the experience, in the park, with grandma and live entertainment. Yesterday I cooked—we cooked or BBQed. Last night's meal was the first of the Summer and a change from our regular procedure of cooking on our deck. I had Mark move the baroque pit to the front of the house which is shaded from the afternoon sun. But, it's weird doing this act in the front yard. It's like exposing yourself. Big smoke billowing up from the grill right infront of the garage. Kids zipping by on bikes and skate boards, or in our neighborhood the kids are cruising those electric “razor boards” and scooters. Neighbors were out with their leashed dogs, the dogs were over interested in what we were doing. The neighbors just sniffed and stared straight ahead as if not to notice us doing something indecent The neighbors did not phase me a bit.

Funny though. I had the strangest dream. I was in college or in a seminar of something and I had just gotten up and I needed to bath and I wondered round till I found a room with bathtubs. The room was empty I went in and stripped and started my bath when people started wondering in and taking their separate tubs. These folks sat in tubs filled with water with their clothes on and I wasd naked?!! Go figure.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Property Slug?




We have been in this house for more then fourteen years and in all that time we have had the same set of neighbors to the North and to the South. We have been blessed in that they are great neighbors. Lou to the North is a bit gruff, he owns a bar and who knows what else. He lives by himself in this huge house, he has powerboats, muscle cars and a “land yacht” he takes out even national holiday in the Summer. Lou for the most part is a mystery. He speaks of a career he had with GM and he owns only GM products except this last year when a new Audi appeared in his drive way. I asked him how he like his Audi and his reply was

I hate it. I am going to get rid of it. It doesn't have any power. Besides I am a GM man. I don't know what I was thinking.” This was enough and I knew the conversation. But Lou is approachable enough but I rarely approach. Lou keeps to himself, keeps his yard up and leaves me alone. Perhaps that is enough.


The other` night I was speaking to my other neighbor to the South The H's are great people. I have written about them before in this blog. The H's are older then Me or Dianne and are very approachable. They help us when we need it, give us all kinds of advice and, act like neighbors. The other night I was talk with Al and he was looking behind me and indicated that Lou was in my yard doing something behind by va. I blew it off thinking Lou had just lost a tennis ball or something. But Lou was still there when I was finished visiting with the H's and I knew I was going to have to engage in conversation with him like it or not. And there Lou was big as Dallas; squatting down on his haunches, down by my van digging at something in the fence which separates our property. I has not noticed when I wheeled up but Lou's Rainbirds (Lou always nothing but the best) were on laying down a perfect carpet of water on his perfect grass. Lou was focused on a sprinkler which had somehow gotten tangled in the fence and was not working properly. In a few moment Lou had the sprinkler untangled and working like a champ jetting a huge arch of water perfectly over a section of Lou grass.


The fence which separates our property is of rickety wood. Some of the slats are gone but for the most part the gray sun bleached pieces are standing their guard to make sure my concrete does not invade his perfect grass. A couple of times over the years I have noticed a slat had fallen from the fence and I have righted the wood and pounded the piece back into place. I have thought of replacing the fence more then once but I figured the fence was Lou's and he would replace the barrier when he thought he needed.


We did engage in conversation and during that conversation Lou indicate he was thinking of replacing the wood gates to his back yard with a chain link gate. The gate which is currently there is wood looking very much like the wood on the fence between us. Then Lou suggested maybe I should think going with chain link when I replaced the fence between us!. MY FENCE!!? I must have had a puzzled look on my face when he added that “ Yeah, it would not take much chain link to do this space. I just nodded like i knew what he was talking about. Some how the conversation turned to property lines and this led to us examining the property slug. Lou then proceeded to show the slug Sure enough right there in the side walk just other side of the fence was a small piece of mettled which looked like the head. The property slug! The official measuring device which set my propery from his and sure there was another on my South side separating my area from Al's.

And the fence was ALL on my side of the slug. Looks like I have some decisions to make.