Almost Halloween

I sent this image to many of my friends on the email as a Halloween card and i was surprised at how many returned the email wondering if I had caught my lips in a vacuum of milking machine--they did not realize the lips were plastic lips which used to be found everywhere there penny candy stores. My boss passed these out to staff this morning in honor of the this mid-level holiday. I like to hold the lips in my mouth as long as I can before I end up chewing the wax lips like gum.

Broadcast Done

Here is the broadcast--we did it yesterday and it came out better then I anticipated--at least that is what everyone ,who has seen it, is saying. The next broadcast will be in November and hopefull will be much better.

You will notice I have embedded the entire 28 minutes or so of the broadcast not that the broadcast was good, in so much as how bizarre I tend to come across on the camera and how huge I look on camera. Dianne has some suggestions as to how or why this happened. we used a typical webcam for this project and it caught at this totally weird angle--trully this is what Dianne said. But, I am now dragging my DVD camera and firewire out of retirement. I think if we use these devices on the next broadcast the quality of the product will be much better. Actually, I must admit I kinda of liked the experience and I am looking forward to doing the next broadcast with great expectations. I still have to get to know the software on this website much better especially the chatroom aspects.

Testing 1-2-3

Tomorrow is our first broadcast and we are not ready. I am going through with the plan anyway and I am sure we will learn tons but I will be hppy just to get the broadcast running nd have a few people log-on to the broadcast and to see how the system all works.

Bonnie and I went over to Office Depot(OD) this morning and found a camera which will work with VISTA . I VISTA but I am being forced to comply with Gate's change--I hve never really considered changeing from PC to Apple but today I am beginning to consider going to another system.

When Bonnie and I got to the OD is was closed and not to open for 30 minutes so we went to Barnes and Nobel to kill some time and I was able to find some more information about about thw books of David Foster Wallace, the writer who hung himself the middle of last month. B&N did not have the huge volume of his huge volume Infinite Jest but the volume was not in it's place. I will try to find it on the INTERNET maybe even order the volume and see how much the thing intimidates me.

When OD fifnally did open we quickily found the equipment we needed and retuned to the office and set up the camera an tried to figure it out. So now we have the camera set up but I am a little diappointed but I have some other ideas and we will have to explore those.

I f you want to see other test clips then go to http://www.ustream.tv/channel/access-utah--now. If you want you can tune in to our first real broadcast tomorrow at 11:30 a.m. mountian.

Body of War

My office has become a political hotbed since my current boss has taken over a couple of years ago and that is cool. I like the office that way, this level of political involvement makes feel I am keeping in touch with the national scene. When I worked for Independent Living (IL) I felt I was on the cutting edge of all things political related to disability. Now I am working with an office atmosphere which is much more sensitive to developmental disability and not cross disability but still I like the daily tension the political decisions of our national leaders render and the tension and contempt to see and now how negatively these event will affect people with disabilities which to a degree equates to job security.

However, I am a pretty shallow duck and though I can be a political player on any level, local, state or national. I basically turn of the”juice” at five o clock or when the assignment is done, and pick up my “other” life. My boss, however loves the political scene, more then just work—she is into it following the national players like some follow movie stars live or national sport figures. This is really cool for the boss, because it gives her always something to do there is always some event happening or speaker coming into town or film and lecture to go. It makes me a little envious. Dianne has been getting deeper and deeper into the political spectrum as well. So when the boss started talking about Phil Donahue’s Body of Lies I perked up. Phil and company were coming to Salt Lake for a film and lecture in fact the film and lecture was part of a whole weekend lectures, other films and general activism. I told Dianne and showed her the hand out the boss had given me on Thursday as we waited in line to vote Friday.
Cool! I thought I was going to do some thing like the boss and become involved for free, just because I believed.

The lecture and film was to start at 6:30pm—by 3:30 pm we had voted, had lunch with my daughter Bridget and I was wasted. Dianne laid down for a nap and I just wondered round the house tying to nap in my chair but not being very successful. By 4:30 I had found the Medical channel was watching fat people loosing weight through the magic of medicine an money. Dianne was up and changed by 5:00 and getting ready. I was going to change into more “zippy” but decided to keep my weekend slacks and sweatshirt. I looked pitiful like a holes guy ducking into a film and a lecture(free) to get out of the elements an snag a few Z’s and maybe some wine if there happened to be a reception following. We drove the van into the city, I took a bit to find a parking place—It has been a while since I was really out in public after hours and needed a parking space. We walked a couple of blocks but go to the lecture just as introductions were being made and even though I m part of the Left and maybe even the Far Left. I forgot what the left looks like students, weirdo’s and radicals. In fact the disable seating was at the top of the seats and true to form there was a homeless guy, who looked just like the Uni-bomber. Even the Uni-bomber could not take it longer after about an hour into the film got up and grabbed his back pack and blanket and left the building. Dianne gave his seat the once over to make sure he did not leave any packages behind.

I had issues with Body of Lies, A film about the struggle of a vet wounded in Iraq a T-12 para who was just a boob. Phil seemed to makes as many mistakes a film maker could make in producing a film about a person with a disability. I can understand the need to “grab” your audience but use the old “gimp” in your face or rather “pathetic gimp” in your face trick.

The question and answer after ward was just as bad with all the folks who were out of the audience being abducted by aliens were lusting and fighting for the microphone to give the best personal Iraqi war story. Boy was I glad to get home. There is more today and even tomorrow but I might pass. I want to make soup.

Copier?

Board meeting is over, done for another quarter atleast! And I more or less survived. Really only three of the six or seven board members showed up and the ones which did show up arte the good guys. We chatted, had Hershey’s kisses and finally got down to business of the meeting. I passed out hand outs, essentially the statistics of the following year and last quarter. I made it look effortless—thanks to Dianne and Tory and even they did not know the trauma and terror I passed through getting to the point of seemingly effortlessly passing out the handouts.

I realized with a start at yesterday’s staff meeting that I had now process the stats for the first quarter of our physical year which ended in September. I have been so engrossed in trying to complete the Annual Report that I totally spaced the Quarterlies. So yesterday afternoon I was downloading the totals I could get off the pathetic call tracking software I use and tried to think of a way I could process the data into some sort of readable document before the next morning. I should have been on this task all three days of my mega weekend but the boss really talked me out of it saying I should enjoy my weekend time. Really, who am mi to argue? So I zipped the data in my thumb drive and headed home on the train, as I swayed on the train a solution, a simple solution came to me: I already have graphs built for the Annual Report, if I could sort out my raw data in the same way and then, all I would have to do is plug the data results into the graphs.

This is what we did and even that took much longer then I had anticipated but we did it and finally got into bed about 11:20 pm. So get into work and download the images and print out the quarterlies and I am home free.

So I drag myself out of bed , as usual, at 4:30 and get to the office with two and half hours before my meeting more then enough time except for some reason, when I bring up my images to print the images come out alright but they are in black and white! Not only did I save the filed to my thumb drive, but Dianne also sent the files to my State email account! None of the files would come up—however, on the lap top the files came up as they should. So we pulled all the plugs and tried to attach the lap top to one of the color printers but did not have the right USB extensions. It was Tory when she came in asked why we just did not print the color documents we printed off yesterday? Bing, Ding,Ding…my printer as well as FDB’s (front desk bonnie) had color printers which also act as copiers and the day was saved. We were printing right up to ten minutes before the meeting began. Everything came away looking good, making us look good.

Once again a bullet dodged.

Toil and stress

Tension, tension toil and stress
year end reports make life a mess
I'll be back sooner the late
but, for right now
y'all must wait!!

Just Waiting for Dad

>Mom elected to stay in Boise-I am writing this as an update to the post I did last week when I heard my mother was relocating again to Utah. Talk about a sucker punch, moving a 95+ year old women from a fairly safe environment, where she has 24 hour nursing care and supervision, relatively good food and a strong family support base to live with a family member’s family in a home which is not very accessible, but cold be. Granted the cousin has been a nurse and my other cousin is just a good guy who could and would make the situation work but I just don’t know if the these guys and that part of the family knows what they were getting themselves into. And I am not the family policeman, actually far from it. I am usually the last to know anything happening in the family and that is OK too. I really have my hands full with just my own little, immediate family with grand daughters, near and far, and kids everywhere it seems; so I try to keep my head down and watch the “bullets” over head. When I heard Mom had changed her mind and was not returning to Utah I called her to see how she was taking this decision and how the mess had got to the point it had. I found the decisions, she says, was hers, and that she was even barely aware of what was happening and to what level of preparations were being made or taking place. When I called my cousin, to where mom was supposedly moving he said the same. I am not sure but my mom and my aunt are very close and I know they talk everyday and I know the two can barely stand being apart from each other. They are the only two left in their generation, everyone else is gone and there are lonely for the mirror the represent to each other, seeing themselves in a better, clearer, happier time when ever they look at each other. So I figure in a moment of familial desperation, need and want they cooked up a plan to ‘break mom’ out of the ‘place’ and make a run for the border. But since their plan of escape relied so heavily on collusion of various family members the plan was bound to fail and in the end all they could do was to admit they new little or nothing of events which were transpiring. I think mom knows how good she has got it at the “home” where she is riding out her days working hard to be happy and content because that is what her kids and family want to hear. I am a parent I even now make silly sacrifices, the other day were out at a restaurant and she wanted a fairly expensive dessert , the solution was simple Dianne and I for went any dessert—what else could you do? So, I imagine Mom to some degree sighing and taking a deep breath as she starts removing her clothes from the suitcase and looking longing at the clock and her husband’s image.

Sons

Brooks left today to return home to Portland. He has been in town for a week with training and visiting family and friends--a seemingly very short week. The lad is doing great in the Vancouver/Portland area. Brooks has his own insurance business and is doing great. It was good getting a chance to see him.

Mark A was over yesterday, mowing the lawn and taking measurements to fix the over hang our ramp. It is currently in such disrepair that when the snow and ice come we have a horrible ice flow.
we have to get the repair done soon or we're in trouble.

Early

It’s UEA—big conference for Utah teachers, school is out till Monday and Auni spent the night last night. She woke this morning to noises in the house. Auni woke at 4:30 am the usual time I wake up but lately I have been sleeping in until 7:00 or even 8:00 not today. Now, everyone is back asleep and I am up an I will be sleepy the rest of the day.

Dianne and I are hoping to vote today; see what this “early vote” thing is all about, get the deed done with and enjoy November 4th. I am too sleepy to write any more…maybe more later…maybe not.

More of the Same

Last night as I tried to watch TV our home was best with calls. I finally realized that it was not going to be a TV night devoted myself over to the phones calls, family phone calls. One of my kids is flying into the Salt Lake tonight and we of course are hosting a dinner at out house for gold Brooks our wayward son who has been "growing a business" in Washington State and is returning home for the first time since setting out to make his fortune a couple of years ago. Th call was a maintenance, letting us know when he is flying in, anmd where he is staying and what time is dinner. This call parcipitated to his sisiter and brother in law who were preparing much of the dinner, v So the first call was not bad but we essentially missed Chuck really no big deal--thank God for INTERNET TV where you can actually watch shows you missed, any time one desires. I actually just turned down the sound and basicailly followed the show.

The other call of the evening was much mlre truamatic, right after the eight o-clock hour, right after the begining of Heroes. My younger brother, Paul was on the line asking if I ha heard the news about Mom. I braced myself dor the worse: I knew she was eithe locked in near struggle for life, just holding on untill all the family could gather round as she let out the family mysteries or that Mom was already dead, the funeral was to be today or Wednesday anmd if we were coming could we bring some seven-up, funeral potatoe casserolle and a bag of jerky. I almost missed my dad's funeral because everyone thought someone else had called me. As it turned out Mom was still, indeed quie alive and doing well, so well, that she is moving back to Salt Lake the end of next week!!! Have the immediate family want to declare her incompentnent and the other half just says, let her go because she is going to do what she wants anyway, after all this is mom. Something is going on, and I am the last to know but that is cool. But it sounds to be that the deal has been made and details are all bnurt finished and Mom is South bound... again. This time to live with my mechanic and his wife( my cousins). The arrangement sounds dicey to me but they are all grown ups and family, I am just adopted and I wish them the best. there is a Rod Stewart song I wish I had access to which would make great background to this posting but I can't quite remember the song. All I know is I am loosing sleep...

Snow

So today I have to write, It’s Sunday the last day of my three day weekend and I have to log some creative home-time. Tomorrow, I have to really start putting together the` “e-newsletter”. This project is sitting on my chest like a Stephen King character. So, I need to do the newsletter, the broadcast and the year end report and still do my regular job of answering phones, meeting consumers as they wonder in, and mixing with staff. This is stupid. I am hoping I can limit my pieces to 500 words or so. I think the first edition is going to be somewhat limited: just enough to introduce the newsletter, the broadcast and concept; and if I can pull all that off I will be happy and impressed with myself. So if I don’t get to the articles for the newsletter I cannot really do anything else. I wish I would have done it yesterday

Snow came last night the first real snow of the season and already the snow is gone but the snow was falling with a vengeance when I got up round 7:00 this morning. I made coffee and turned on NPR and made Sunday sounds and enjoyed the morning. Dianne still would not be up for a couple of hours so I occupied my self with a little kitchen clean up and preparation for breakfast. We shopped yesterday and one of the items we purchased was day old cinnamon swirl bread a small loaf just the size for French toast. I cooked the whole loaf using just 5 eggs. I roused Dianne out of bed just as I was finishing the last two pieces of toast- I wanted her to enjoy her French toast , fresh and hot. I had kept the coffee hot. Sad, the snow is all but gone now—there are traces here and there, on the van in the crevices of tree limbs. It looks as if the front yard pants have all survived even the elephant ears. It may be just my imagination but everything outside, which is supposed to be green looks much greener and much more healthy. I am sure just a prelude to a “killer frost” which is just round the corner—typical.

Lee the Asian Direct TV installer finally finished the work yesterday afternoon with the installation of bright, shinny Direct TV, cable and specialized programming 24 hours a day. Lee is an interesting little guy, a person from Viet Nam, his English is a challenge for me to understand. I even hung up on him the first time he called the house to advise us he was ready to come over and do the installation. I thought he was a wrong number. Even in person it is hard to follow what he is saying but one can if you totally focus on him. But he did the job having to return to the house three separate times.

I have to be careful now! I can waste a lot of time watching the tube. However, I am intrigued there seems to be a lot of features, I have to learn, which will allow me to enjoy the shows I really am interested in anytime I desire. This could be too cool. Still could be dangerous to my already seemingly limited time constraints.

Connections

We are currently disconnected from the INTERNET. We are switching providers from a real dorkey system, hopefully to a provider we hope will give us much better service. Of course we are running into problems immediately. The last cable provider did such a squirrelly job of installation the Quest guy is just walking round the house scratching his head and marveling that what service we did get we got at all. Now, the Quest guy now, cannot even find a place to hook out house to the mainline, he has driven round the neighbor hood looking for the “signal”.

My buddy across the street: Dan, also works for Quest, as a lineman. I doubt he has anything to do with installations but when Marty, the install guy, started scratching his head and making sound like, ‘I cannot find, the signal,’ or some such stuff Dianne starts using the “Dan card”to the point of calling poor ?Dan, who is out in the field, way out in /west Jordan, doing who knows what on some pole comes on line, a little guarded and Dianne identifies herself, the guard comes almost all the way down when Dianne passes the phone off to Marty, who actually does know Dan. Dan sis still on “speaker “ and his voice has becomes cautious, not sure what is going on—like we’re asking him to fix a race or throw a fight. Luckily, he is really to far away to intervene but actually can give Marty some good ‘intel’ regarding local quest-line connections. This process is slow going and I can tell Marty has some time pressures on him but he is being patient with both of us as they search for the signal and then the password. Marty finally found the signal and then the two wrestled with the issue of not being able to upload, ‘Qwest’s’ own security package—which I am not too worried about—it seems there is some sort of blocker on the big computer system. Again, I am really not too worried about security issues and my systems and connections—Dianne is much more concerned so I guess we are going to have to figure something out. Mark A. and Jasmine are coming over this afternoon and mabe we can figure something out then.

Its way cold today, we have not really started using the furnace and I don’t think we intend to until we are driven by biter cold, in an effort tom save money. I don’t think this decision has anything to do with the “meltdown” we have been conserving all summer and it just makes sense we would keep conserving in the winter as well. We saved hundreds this summer by not running the air conditioner and sleeping with cool wet clothes over our heads. I guess we just do the opposite now till spring.

The Direct TV guy just arrived and barely speaks English, a cute little Asian guy who I hung up on this morning when he called to verify the appointment—Imcould not understand him and I thought he was a Spanish speaker with the wrong number, boy was I off.

Money For Nothing

I hate having to find a new address or find an address for the first time. If I have the time I will make an effort to leave early so I will be sure to be on time and not too stressed out and of course I want to accomplish this in daylight. Yesterday I had a lecture to give up at the University. I was contacted a month ago by an old friend and employer, who has now transitioned to the University as some sort of professor type and needed someone to address her graduate class. Disability Studies: Social Model: Individual Perspective of Disability essentially talk about disability and how, having a disability has impacted my life. Easy duty.

Our University like any major university is always in a flux of growth. I was somewhat familiar with the address the professor gave me and I of course down loaded a map from the INTERNET—which sort of gave me an idea of where I was supposed to be. Because of this presentation I drove into work today , so I loaded up in the van at 3:30 and drove up to the University( ten minutes East of my office) and promptly got lost. I was not as lost as I usually get—but when I get lost driving I have to do a lot of stopping, starting and turning round. Not only is there a lot of construction going on in section of the University but there is also tons of trees and brush and shrubbery in the area concealing any and everything! I pulled over and read the email again with directions and realized I was directly across the street from the Health Education building, so down to the “turnaround” switchback and get out of the van. I still had about three minutes, and when the elevator door open there was the proff , who had actually come down looking for me. She knew I would need some redirection of some kind.

I was supposed to be at the class at 4:30 and I basically made it on time. Disability Studies is a graduate class, I took provisions for 15 students and there actually only about 7-8 folks there and on is a someone from my office and the other is another guy in a wheelchair I have known for decades, a real super crip, at least this super crip actually has a job and works for a living. But still, I was not able to as radical as I usually am, but I radical enough—I ended up lecturing , non-stop for two hours before the professor sort of asked me to leave—but I just kept responding to questions. And telling “war stories” from My Life With Disability.

The professor walked me of the elevator and said I had done a good job, she judges how good a job by the length of time her students ask questions and seem interested. She also informed me that an honorarium also came with the job that she had neglected to tell me—so I guess I’ll claim these hours as vacation and enjoy the opportunity to get paid for talking about myself.

Short and Sweet

I have a few minutes before I take off for work--busy all day no time at the office right now. The boss is back today and I have to show some progress in key project which I believe I can. I will write more this weekend about the office stress and new projects I have been drug into but at the same time I am having some excitement and growth potential. More later...

Busy Days Busy Ways

All of the sudden things are getting super busy at the office. I am going to have to keep my head down and focus for a couple of days, no make that weeks if not months.

The cold came last night...

The cold came last night, not the bitter cold which is yet to come in another four to six weeks but the first killer cold, the cold which puts snow in the visible mountains from my front porch and the death sentence on the leaves of my trees and the flowers in my front yard garden.

Ani had been over since Friday night and we had been busy watching videos, the same videos we watch every weekend she stays: Shrek, Men in Black, Toy Story, Drum Line. Ani brought over a library book and she and Dianne worked at sawing though the volume in the evenings before she went to be. We also went out to Lowes for paint for the ramp, breakfast at Denny’s and finally to Smiths to do a bit of shopping. The cold fronts were moving in as we shopping bring cooler temperatures and rain, light at first then heavy as we finished up but being out was fun and somewhat invigorating as we were finally facing the end of summer. I had kept my eye on the news and the weather which was forecasting a monster storm which turned out to be light in comparison to the reports. But wet and cold enough to feel good to socked into the house, warm with cooking and videos and family life.

The summer lasted long this year, I noted, each day as I rolled down my ramp in the mornings on my way to work, or up in ramp in the evenings as I came home, The flower and the leaves seemed healthy and acted like they would round for ever. There is a huge tree I pass on my way to and from the train station whose leaves have yet to even begin to turn—we have yet to experience a killer frost. This week though, I think I will see the change begin. The yellows and golds will begin working their way in from the ends of the tree’s long branches and soon the leaves will fall or be tugged by the autumn winds now as the wind surly will.
I have really enjoyed Dianne’s flower garden in the front yard this year especially the elephant ears. I have loved this plant as it sprung up in the spring and took color and shape through out the summer. The elephant ears are much more hardy then I would have imagined surviving the hail and intense winds of a couple of storms which blew through in late July and August. I worried after the ears in late-august when we turned off the sprinklers for the year. The ears began to droop and took me a while to realize the droop was because they were no longer getting the moisture the plants needed. UI rushed out with little water and we had a little rain and they perked up a little. I noticed this morning when I` looked out the ears had regained their freshness and looking green and healthy. This early Fall water is but a short reprieve however. The snow on the mountains says it all. The frost will come rolling in with a vengeance later this week or next or at the latest the week after and the beautiful elephant ears will be gone and the growing season will finally be gone for this year. We’re going to dig up the bulbs and see if we can bring back the ears for next year. I hope we can and I hope I will be round to se them.

$6000!!!!!!

Wednesday I was called by my wheelchair sales guy, Brent, and he wanted to come by my office and show me a couple of wheelchairs which were in the category of chairs I had an interest I could not do it Wednesday but I knew I would be off work Friday so I had him set the display at my home at 4:00. This was a drag for me because it made me have to be sure home late in the afternoon, but Brent had arranged to have the Permobile rep in the area for that day and I did want to see these products. Remember I had pretty much decided to go with the Permobile Street and wanted to see one of these units. Then Last night as I was taking the train home I ran into my buddy, Andrew who drives a Permobile C500 which goes like a bat out of hell and is a massive front wheel-drive and really, is everything I wanted.
Scott was the Permobile rep and he got here right at four and began down loading the chair he was going to show. Scott is a nice guy, young but seems to know his business and informs me the Street actually no longer speeds up to 7.5 mph which I think I need but he can trick out the model to 6.5 mph which is slower then I want but considerable.
Brent finally shows up and we talk. I think I have mad up my mind, now I want a C500 with the whistles and bell, recline seat and elevator.
This chair is going to cost in the neighborhood of $30,000! My insurance will cover 80% which will be bout $24,000 leaving the $6,000 my responsibility: that’s a lot of tacos. At this point I don’t know how I am going to do $6000.00 but the lads did not seem to care right now. Brent measured me again and about different features and what I used a powerchair for in my day to day life. But in the back of my mind I keep thinking about the six grand and the fact non of the new chairs will do the coveted 7.5 mph. It seems the Permobile has made the decision to “top” the speed at 6.5 mph for liability issues which may not be a bad idea but I still want the speed. Then Scott suggests that perhaps he can scour the country and maybe out there somewhere is demo, an older model C500, which still has the older faster motors and I would have everything I want. Not only would I get the speed that I want but I would get a significant reduction in price since the model is older. I was delighted and gave Scott the go ahead and Brent finished up the measuring. I am still cautious and I doubt they will be able to find what I need. I am also concerned about the seating system. The seating system would be new and this be something is would have to get used to. I’ll just have to see what happens and hope my luck holds.
I hate change.

Personal Terror

As a person with a disability who is trying to age in place ,i.e. live independently at home, my home and maintain a job, a regular job working regular hours( 40) per week. One of my worst terror is that something might happen which would force me to loose some of the independence I have clung to over the years of my life. These last few weeks as I have, once again, reentered the medical arena I have been come keenly aware at how much these medical folk can have an impact on your life if you let them.
Yesterday, I went up to University Hospital to have a “Doppler” done on my leg. I have had some swelling and coloration on y lower leg for some time and Dianne was becoming quite worried, I finally called my primary care doc and she was also concerned and wanted me to come in for this Doppler which she was hoping would show if I had blood clots in the leg and make sure the veins were OK. I was encouraged and relieved when the doc reported that everything looked good, no clots and venous was OK but I needed to consider wearing ted hose or compression stockings!?!! Right now as I sit and type these words I am physically repelled at the thought of wearing compression stocks. It is not so much as having to wear the socks, as much as having to have someone else put these socks on and then take them off. This is one thing I know I cannot do my self do to he strong elastics used in the socks for the very purpose of pushing the blood back to the heart. My doc also ants me to wear them 23 hours a day( one our they can be off while I do my hygiene routine) WRONG! I hate to see myself as the non-compliant patient but that is what I m becoming. I still have not taken the pills she prescribed, water pills, which are supposed to rid my body of extra water=means trips to the bathroom. Hey, I work for a living, I don’t have time to be hold up in the john every thirty minutes and I sleep nude, thank you very much, I don’t need rubber band socks putting the squeeze all through the night. But again the biggest fear is not being able to do these things by myself, independently. I am up at 4:30 am and have to be dressed, fed and out of the house by 5:45 am –I don’t have time compression socks! But this all whispers to me “you are getting old, your wearing out, you have to have someone help you.
I just struggled in the bathroom trying to get my pants back up after using the toilet—I rarely do use any toilet but my home facilities but every once in a while I am on my own out in the world. It took me an hour from start to finish but I eventually got my pants back up and myself half way presentable just barely and should do until I can get home. I am always surprised and pleased I can still these activities of daily living by my self but the day is coming when I won’t be able to and that day terrifies me.

Picking Up The Slack

Today has been a perfect Fall day, blue skies with lots of clouds which may have threatened rain and thunder storms and the temperatures skyrocketed into the high 80’s, a perfect day to visit with my next door neighbor, Al. I have been neglecting Al for the past couple of weeks—so reason specifically except I have been busy. But I found out yesterday that one of his friends, a fairly close friend died. The friends name was Parley. I new him but not well. Actually yesterday, I tied to visit with Al but he disappeared in the afternoon. I looked all over the neighborhood for him and was a bit concerned. But turns out Al had gone out for a walk and turned in a direction I had not anticipated. But he was OK.

Parley used to live in the neighborhood and he and Al had been friends for some time, I was the new comer 16 17 years ago and had never got to know Parley. Parley often came over and joined Al and I when Al and I would be out by Al’s back steps visiting. I sort of felt Parley was muscling in on our conversation. Parley lived up round the corner part of the old guard. Following Parley’s retirement from Quest he purchased a couple of apartments in the neighborhood and kept close vigil on his “units” as Parley liked to call them. Five or six years ago he had enough of the “neighborhood” and the landlord moved South to Alpine, a community in another, more conservative county about forty-five minutes away. Parley continued to keep a pretty high level of visibility in the neighborhood. Parley had the money to have a person mow the lawn, provide upkeep and generally keep an eye on his property but Parley elected to do this himself dropping by once or twice a week to mow the law and do upkeep. Like I said, Parley was an OK guy, little more conservative for my taste but he always had interesting stories about the traumas and terrors of his property and tenants. It was always entertaining to hear views of renting from the landlords perspective. Parley did not die a natural death, cancer or old age. He died from an accident semi-traumatic but I guess traumatic enough to do the job.

Parley was just twenty years older then me, 77, not young but not as old as he could have been. Parley had a huge family who all took part in the funeral. I asked Al, if the funeral was as long as conference(two hours). Al said “no” just a lot of family talks and family singing. I have attached a hot link to his obituary and that is a nine hundred dollar obit! I am sorry Parley is gone—not that I will miss him but I know that both my neighbors well especially Albert. Al is a nice, quiet and shy. He does not have a lot of truly personal friends Parley was one of those. I think Albert is going to miss Parley a great deal…I guess its up to me to pick up the slack,

conspiracy and collusion

Dianne and I saddled up and drove to University Hospital at 2:00 pm to meet with Brent the sales guy and Randy my PT and seating specialist to begin the process of ordering my new power chair. I used to go to all these event by myself but lately I have started inviting Dianne to accompany me not only as my wife but as my Medical Advocate(MA). I have been pleasantly surprised at how effective Dianne has been as my MA, particularly how through and effective she is in developing my case.
We got to the rehab unit right on time and Brent and Randy was there—

Friday afternoons are typically slow on rehab units but I was surprised to see how many people and how much activity was going on when we checked in. There were in PT students still hanging out following Randy around like adoring fans of their rock star. I was kind of surprised to note that Randy had already softened Brent the durable medical guy, up as to my desire to consider a completely new chair as opposed to fixing up my current Pride product, the Quantum, which I have liked but goes just way to slow to have to endure for another five years if I do not have to. Randy had informed me that that the chair I want, the Permobile Street Corpse/Urban Challenger, which costs way too much but does not yield the commissions that durable medical sales guys like. But Brent was OK with my decision. And sounded as if he was hell bent to push my case.

So we spent the next hour and half getting measured, talking about my needs, what I was able to do physically and how such a chair as the urban challenger would allow me to meet my vocational and social goals. This was a look on the “inside” for me, these two guys were actually figuring out how they could manipulate the system to achieve my goal getting the equipment I think I need.
I was pleased and impressed at how aggressive and effectively Dianne presented my case of the wife of a person who needed—the best powerchair on the market today. How I needed a chair which could speedily get me back and forth to my train station safely and dependably. How I used the powerchair every day and day out rain and snow light and dark. How even if the cost to us is going to be astronomical, even after insurance intervention, we will just figure out a way to pay the cost for years to come. I am not sure how we will do this but I have to have faith.

So now everyone has colluded: the PT, the durable medical provider, the MA and the crip, this is conspiracy of the highest caliber. Now Randy , the PT, is going to attempt to write the “need” letter just the right way, which my Katia, my medical provider, will sign and present to the insurance folk which will , hopefully, get the ball rolling. I am thinking my portion of responsibility is going to be between 8,0000 and 10,000 dollars!! This is not right but just the way it is. So, I have been measured and almost authorized now the real work begins… conspiracy and collusion

Power Chair and Tigers

Ok if you have been reading this blog you know I am getting ready to consider
getting another wheelchair, a power chair, hopefully more powerful then anyone I
have had up to this time. In fact, I am meeting with Brent, the guy from my
durable medical equipment provider, tomorrow at 3:00 pm at the outpatient rehab
facility I frequent. I set this appointment earlier in the week to make sure the
appointment fell on my day off. I spoke with my physical therapist(PT) Randy,
who gave me some options and specifically a specific kind of wheelchair which
Randy feels will best meet my needs. The only problem is the chair he specified
is a super expensive, top of the line, hard to convince insurance companies of
the need for such a chair. This chair would be a high performance chair made
in another country with superb quality and a two year warranty. I am talking
about a chair which could cost $15,000 or easily more. This chair would recline,
raise up four inches, and best of all travel two and one half miles faster then my present chair—which would be wonderful.

My PT also kinda of warned me that the shop Brent works for is sort of committed
to the power chair I am currently piloting which would acceptable, if I could
get a chair which would be faster then the chair I have had. I sense things are
going to get sticky before things get smooth…there are tigers across the street!

This post was supposed to have been entered Thursday!

Better Homes and Gardens

Things were slow round our house on Sunday morning and Anakah had spent the night. The morning was beautiful, as any last Sunday morning of summer should be: bright sunshine, warm temperatures and the smell of bacon, eggs and grits still heavy on the air. Anakah was using her scooter but was becoming more and more bored with nothing to do. I was no feeling as good as I could and did not feel like gong up to State street to the Beans and Brew where we had gone a number of Sunday mornings add to the fact that my power chair is becoming more and more fragile and I guess I don’t want to stress the chair out anymore then I have too. So I was happy just to sit out on my ramp and read my latest Stephen King and enjoy my last Sunday morning of Summer.

Saturday night Anakah \and I had been cruising the neighborhood, Anakah on her foot scooter and me in my power wheelchair. We had gone all over our neighborhood and somewhere in out journey Anakah had lost a bolt off her chair, the bolt which held the handle bars in place. I was impressed that she had heard the metal parts hit the road when they fell and she was able to retrieve most of the bracket but was not able to find the nut.
The following morning Anakah was focused on finding the bolt and had talked her grandmother into waging a search for said bolt. I knew immediately this was going to be a futile waist of time but the three of us set out trying retracing out steps not finding the needed hardware but leaves , flowers, lost trinkets and I even found a pair of butter fly wings. Gruesome as this sound pinned to the pavement where the vehicle has some how run over the little beat but lat the wings, mostly intact. It was about then I realized that Dianne was searching for Fairy materials. Dianne and Anakah were carrying wicker baskets and putting all the treasures we found in the basket and when we got home she ad Anakah set to building a small house in the garden just right for fairies. Of coursed the building of a fairy house was a Sunday Silly, something done on Sunday just for fun. When we got back from the search I returned to my Stephen King and later when I poked my head out of my book the two had completed their work and I was asked to inspect their labors. The fairy quarters was a work of art. I now you cannot see much from the image I have posted as is but if you were to click on image and see the image I its fullness and hugeness. Look round the house, see the toad stool? The butterfly wings are on the toad stool. The mini baskets are tooth fairy baskets. There is a quarter in on and a penny in the other. The roof is woven plant leaves and the pod count as lanterns.. Th real magic of the fairy house is the idea and structure kept Anakah busy for am ood part of the remainder of the day. Magic!

Decisions

I am loosing my motors! I found the grim news on Friday when I checked into the wheelchair repair shop to see my electric charges were seeming to deplete way to quick. I charge my batteries every night, I have to, if I do not I am afraid I will be stranded somewhere the next day. I have an “power” indicator light which works through colors green to yellow to red and finally blinking red which means I had better charge soon or I will stop in my tracks—which is not a good thing. So, now when I leave for work with a full charge I am way into the yellow by mid morning and a b linking red light my lunch time if I choose to range at all. Luckily I have charger at the office I often plug into and at least keep my power levels up.

So I go to Magic Rest, my wheelchair place, and the bad news is the motors are going and because the motors are “going” they tend to draw more power from my batteries and show that I need a charge. Though no prices were quoted, I know if I have the motors replaced it is going to cost me upwards of $1000.00 or more and there is a strong chance the costs might be covered by my insurance this good, but this is also bad. I am being pointed in the direction of investing in a new chair entirely especially since the battle of the butt sore. The talk now is to maybe consider a power chair which actually reclines that also elevates my feet! This would take to weight off my butt and hopefully cut down on the probability of pressure sores. But I am being told if I were to invest in the motors the insurance people would be less likely to justify the expense of a new chair after replacing the motors. The Magic Rest shop tech also indicated that right now, with my chair acting so odd and the motors beginning to fail that if the insurance folk would spring for a major chair up grade it would be now. But even if the insurance people go for the upgrade they will only cover the usual 70 percent leaving the 30 percent to me which could 3000-5000.00 or maybe more. Some of these chair cost up to 30,000 or more. So, I don’t know what to do. There may be a third option. The re utilization program I am part of has many motors and I am sure I could get them at a pretty good price. Hum what to do. One of my biggest concerns is that the motors will fail on my way to or home from work or somewhere out on the train line. Many things to think about.

GD2 was over this week with her dad to mow my yard. I was able to get a couple of images of Jasmine as she flitted round the ramp and yard. I am going to follow up with GD3 soon. I noticed some new images on her mom’s Myspace account. I’ll harvest an image of Riley soon They are ally beauties.

Changling

I cannot believe my last entry was Monday! Not that work has been, that busy but I have been somewhat focused this week, with a information fair I did last night, the medical appointment the first of the week, and my AT Council meeting on Wednesday and the new FOX shows I have just not done my writing. I doubt today’s entry will be an award winner either but I thought I had better check in. I have to get ready, soon, for an appointment I have this morning to have my power chair looked at. So I am busy. Like who is not right? MY health seems to be fairly good. I am not about week into the meds from last weeks appointment—though I have not heard back from Monday’s blood draw. I really need to get on some form of prostate shrink medicine. I have run out of the stuff Dianne had made for me. But the other issues seem to have cleared up and Dianne is totally excited as my body and system rebounds to better health. I still have some skin irritations I must keep an eye on but by enlarge I am back in the game,

I do not know if a new behavior I am having has anything to do with the medications I have been taking but I have noticed my behavior at the meeting and functions this last week have been remarkably different. I seem to be more friendly, out going and interested in the other participants! Was I more like this at one time? I really don’t remember but I think I may have---very strange. I have not been like this self for a long long time. I felt like a used car sales guy. For instance, I am chair for the AT Council, it seems I have been chair for ever—but I started the meeting off by telling some stories reflecting on some of the history of the organization—I never do that, that I can remember. Following the meeting and at the Open house I attended last night I actually went round and shook hands and introduced myself to strangers , again behavior I have not exhibited for a great while. Usually, I just shrink back respond only when spoken to and try to exit just as soon a humanly possible. The only change I can think of is the antibiotics. Dianne says the antibiotics are cleaning out my system and as the poisons are purged and I began to feel better I am bringing my old self back! This is a great story and I do not know if I believe the poison entirely but I sure want to and somehow makes sense. Maybe I should the rest of the regimen the Doc scripted for me—I have been dreading that one—but maybe its time as soon as I get this enlarged prostate under control.

FTOG (Frank the Old Guy ) at work is still riding me to get back to some serious writing. Its somewhat annoying but appreciated. I’ll have to start seriously contemplating the idea of serious writing.

Blue Band

You know what I cannot believe is that the Citadel of Cleanliness, a medical center, sterilizes everything except the tourniquets their phlebotomists use to pull blood.

I woke this morning fasting and usually that does not bother, I mean I wake every morning fasting only this morning I could not eat until I made it to the University hospital and have my blood drawn. The blood drawing is the result from the medical appointment I made last week. The blood draw will allow my doc to then proscribe a better prostate shrinker then I am currently using. Like I said, any other morning fasting doe not bother me this morning it did, cause I could not eat I felt dizzy and like I as going to pass out, a little, I cannot believe I am such a histrionic wuss.

Since coffee was out and my usual breakfast of either a bean burrito or a tamale and hot peppers was out as well since I had to have the blood drawn fasting I had an extra half hour this morning so I was way early as I left the house. I was so early I caught one of the early trains which go straight o the University of Utah and up to the medical center. The morning though dark was lit by the Harvest Moon which sat like amazing egg in the Western sky. I got on campus about a quarter to seven and up to the Outpatient Lab by 7:00. Of course the place was almost deserted, one lady which I mistook for a cleaning lady, or some other housing support services. After a few minutes she walked over as asked if I was there for lab services, I said I was and she said the lab would not be till 7:30 a.m., but she would try to see if she could find some tech who would pull my blood because I was there and ready.

About a quarter after 7:00 the blood staff started filing in and they looked as groggy as I felt with no coffee or food in me. One finally noticed me an asked if I was the name of the file she held in her hand. I was the only one in there who else could I have been? So she had me come over to the window and I laid out my arm and she wrapped the tourniquet found my vein and sucked my blood, two vials. I looked away for some reason this mornings extraction was a bit more uncomfortable then usual. Her name was Brenda, pulled the needle and placed the cotton ball on the puncture and I dutifully held my arm so the cotton stayed in place. A few minutes later I was on the train heading into work just two hours late. Luckily, I had worked at least two hours over the weekend at my Friday meeting.

Later on in the morning as Tory and I were arguing over who was going to take a lunch, I backed my power chair away from the desk to look in my backpack and there on the floor was the rubber tourniquet that Brenda had used in my arm. I somehow must have escaped the medical center with the tourniquet laying on my feet no one noticed. I picked up the band from the floor with my hook, when Tory germafobe indicated how filthy the band was and visibly backed a way from the blue rubber band and started her dry heaves. I shrugged and held the tourniquet at arms length and wonder how many, dirty, infected arms this band had been round and the last one it had been round now was mine.

Thanks Gabe!

Today was another one of those days where, because of ones disability, you always seem to be in the way. I have a ramp which is what I use to access my house, the ramp is build of wood and the seasons have taken their toll on the structure ; particularly the foot of the ramp. The snows and the rains have caused the end to begin “peeling” up making the ramp difficult to use especially in my manual wheelchair. The rails have become wobbly and some of the bracing underneath have rotted causing great concern to Dianne and to be to some degree. Luckily for us/me Gabriel, has skills in wood remodeling and volunteered to come over and do the work and today was the day.

Today was a perfect day for the job. A perfect autumn day-sunshine and the temps in the low seventies and just enough wind to make everything pleasant; Neighbors were out and the kids across the street were home giving Anakah something to do. Dianne was busy helping Gabe, getting him water, tools and just being useful. I was just in the way.

That’s the other thing when ever someone comes over to do something like this, really something for me I am driven to stay out with the person till the job is finished even if there is clearly nothing I can do to help except, really, to stay out of the way and just let them work. So I was out on the ramp reading, out on the ramp was the only place I could be or in the house since once Gabe removed the bottom of the ramp I was trapped in the house. So I sat on the ramp reading but where I sat sooner then later I was in someone’s way. I would move and get situated and then move again. Then I would go back in the house until the guilt would move me back on the ramp. The project took four hours and Gabe did a great job and I will be happy and grateful to Gabe and Dianne each time I go up or come down the ramp. I jut wish I could do more. Thanks gabe!!

Ships In Motion

You know how objects I motion tend to stay in motion? Well State government is much the same way. There were a number on Stat meetings set in place long before the State lunched its four ten schedule giving many employees Fridays off. I am one of those employees. Not all State organizations were as fortunate. And I have been on the board of one of those organizations. And yesterday, Friday, was one of those meeting—the DDS Advisory Board. DDS is the Disability Determination Services, these are the folks who determine if a person is disabled enough to be granted Social Security. DDS is a tough job, their management tends to push these workers hard, too hard ,I think in some cases. But serving on the DDS advisory is fairly easy duty. We, usually once every two months and they serve a pretty good lunch, since we meet over the lunch hour. Some times a hot lunch a sometimes a cold lunch but the lunches are always quality. I have always been fortunate to have the time I spend with this organization count as my work time meaning the hour I work over lunch, even though it is a lunch the lunch counts as “work time” and I can take the time off when I need it some time during that pay period.
I have also served as the Chair, of this advisory board, which is no big deal, except other perceive it as a big deal sometimes, which I think is hilarious but has dealt me well over the years. I chair another advisory board, which has sent me to numerous out of state meetings just because I was the Chair. Basically all I do is show up, pound the gavel, oif afforded a gavel, read the minutes and direct the meeting and make sure I bring ir to a close at the end of the appointed time, usually two hours. That is about it. I am amazes at how seriously the directors of programs take this voluntary position always asking my approval of agendas and even some actions the agency might take. I have never really understood this faux power but I always mention my attendance at these meeting when writing my annual reports.

I have served on the DDS Advisory Board for the past 10 years. I have missed few meetings and enjoyed the food they have offered. I have rarely made waves when waves were not needed—it’s a perk. Yesterday’s meeting was my last DDS Advisory Board meeting. I have served two four terms plus, when I came on board I finished some one else’s term which had two years remaining. I had to “step down” it’s in the by-laws, two terms, full terms is all you get. That’s OK, no big deal. I can use the extra Friday, now that I have Fridays off. And DDS will get along with out me just fine and I do have the option to be considered for service after I stay a way for a year and that decision would have to be approved by my boss who was not my boss ten years ago and I sometimes wonder how much she thinks this meeting is worth. The meals are great and the others I associate with are stimulating to a degree and the comp-time is always useful and a year is an awfully long time. And who knows what could happen by then.

Medical Advocate

Why is it the moment a person takes action against a particular issue or problem everything changes?

I have suffered with a decubitus sore I got swimming about a year and a half ago. I have suffered with this wound for a year now after a six week bout of actual physical therapy. Dianne has worked to clear this wound up all year and then last week I make the appointment to be seen by my health car provider and magically my wound begins to heal. Granted, Dianne found a somewhat miracle ointment which seems to have done the trick. So the rear end I present to my health care provider (HCP) is essentially free of problem. Don’t get me wrong. Seeing the HCP this morning was important. Dianne has developed a bunch of questions regarding me and the of me of the past year. Dianne also has generated a number of questions, I would never have brought up to the provider on my own. Like my edema plagued legs and I have a weird infection on one of my legs which everyone but me got all excited about this morning. So now Katia my HCP, wants me to take a diauretic (only on the weekend—which will wreck my weekends, I am sure). I don’t know how compliant I am going to be with some of these orders but we shall see.

The upside of the morning’s events: that I will be meeting with my Physical Therapist (PT), Randy, sometime in the next couple of weeks to begin working on a cushion and a new wheelchair, power wheelchair which reclines and will elevate my feet. ELEVATE MY FEET!!!! Seriously I am becoming more and more debilitated! Is this really happening to me?!! I am becoming a total invalid. Actually, I need to step back and look at this—I don’t have to stay in the mega crip chair all the time-but maybe I should, I don’t have to wear ted stockings but maybe I should and I don’t have to take lasix but maybe I should but I probably won’t. I mean I have got along just fine for forty years. I m really afraid that by adding something new into the system, my system, can start a chain reaction which might be disastrous to my system. I guess I am just afraid of loosing my independence and becoming more and more dependent on the medical complex.
I should accept that my independence is going the wither as I age, it is only natural, it has to it is the way of things, the nature things but I find myself resistant.

One last comment: I took Dianne as my I MEDICAL ADVOCATE! I have never done that before. Having a medical advocate is kind of frightening because the advocate tends to bring up things which I would never do—but wish I could, but am too frightened to go through the steps or the RX or the over all consequence of bringing this information to light—my thought process really is kind of warped. But Medical Advocate did and now it’s done, the information is out in he open and who knows where it will go.
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Urban Hitler

I “train” into work almost every morning and this morning was no exception except I had left the house about thirty minutes earlier then usual which meant I got downtown thirty minutes earlier. I get off at the Planetarium stop which is down by the new Mall and older warehouse district a district which is now being gentrified, “bootstrapped” into condos. The process is fascinating and I love to watching the process. Two buildings are being converted and one is looking to be one of those really nice upscale places, hard wood floors, Vulcan ranges and wine racks. It a place I ould never afford but a person has got to dream.

So today with thirty minutes to kill I thought I would take my time and check out the condo.
The building which is being converted sits across the alley of a smallish blue flat building titled “UTAH PAPERBOX CO”(UPC). The UPC thinks they own the alley between these building , and have signs posted” NOT A THRU WAY” and " Tresspassing" and the like but I have never paid attention and just drove my power chair and nothing has ever happened until today. Today as I was coming down the alley I noticed a row of windows at the top of the building, I had not noticed before: what I had thought was one giant open room was actually a row of offices, and I could see just a little of each office decorated to each inhabitants taste. I would roll a ways and stop and peer into the top of the window. I was just wandering when I got the feeling of being watched and I looked up to see a man bearing down on me with a scowl on his face. I was hoping he was not after me but that was too much to be hoping for. Sure enough walked up to be and DEMANDED “Is there something I can do for you?” translation “what the hell are you doing hanging round my building?”

I responded with something like “ nothing, just going to work.”

“Yeah, just where do you work”over there I said pointing to my building”

“Well, you know you are in a traffic zone and car are going to start coming through here any time now” By this time I was getting a little defensive,”Yeah, I know, I come this way every morning.” That was about it, because that was when I chose to zip out of there leaving UPC Hitler with his mug hanging out, an with a million things I wish I had said but did not I thought it wise and best just get out of there. The you/ I have punish my self by having ruminate for the rest of the day and think about what I am going to do tomorrow? Tomorrow, I plan to take the long way in case Adolf is looking for me.

Death

My cell phone rang last Thursday it was Mom, she said she had been trying to get us for a couple of days and finally tried my cell. When my mom cells on y cell I know something serious is up. Mom begins with the history of this call, how she had tried our land line and either message box is full or the phone did not even offer the caller, her, the option of leaving a message. Which very well could have happened since I never check the saved calls and Dianne checks every couple of days, she following the phone report with how she has tried to get hold of my older brother, who lives a couple f blocks from me the and will drive over and check on me when mom does not get hold of me like she wants to but in this case Mom could not even get hold of him so she tried the dreaded cell phone and there I was.

Mom launched into telling me of the passing of my brother’s wife’s younger sister "
sister, who is about 10 years younger then I, a distant memory from my youth. Someone you knew about but only because you knew someone else but someone ten years younger then yourself and a member of your direct or extended family she just did not registrar until your family merges with her family. Still, Mom was go on about how she wanted me to drop everything and give my brother a call, or maybe drop them a sympathy card or something. I told her I would and went back to Bones which was debuting its Fall show.

I did not make the call and I carried my share of guilt because I did not call but really, she was my brother’s wife’s, sister! I did not really know her and hardly knew the family-still what was my responsibility. Dianne thought I should call but I resisted even more.

I guess I was not ready—maybe I was scared. I rationalized that trying to get hold of my brother at anytime is a challenge but really I was scared and angry at, Jackie the deceased; How dare she die making me examine all the fears I have of death, family and closeness and my own pending experiences with death in all of death’s form and especially, finally, mine. How dare mom call me on the American Christmas Week( see earlier blog) when I was nestled infront of the TV with great care. I was mad at every one for shaking up my little non important world!
The funeral is today, in about 45 minutes, I knew it would be. I knew that my brother would be home today, of all days, he would be home and I would be able to get old of him when I called this morning right after I got out of the shower. I braced myself and placed the call. It was Ruby, my sister in law, who answered the phone. I gave her our condolences and excuses for not being there. Only then did I realize that Ruby the oldest female child in the family would also be the “ramrod” who held the family together and most likely orchestrated all the events of the past week. I heard all of this in her voice and wished we had gone. With out any prodding she informed of the death, how and when everything occurred. She was retelling the story, she was processing she was beginning to heal. I listening and she promptly handed me off to Ross , my brother. I was also shocked to feel his grieving. I somehow could not see Ross grieving but here he was plainly glad that I had called. And again, I wished I had made the effort to go up to Boise for the Funeral, for the family, for Ross. I am learning so much as I grow older, I just hope I have the time to learn all I need to know.

Perfect Day

Today has been one of those days I wish I could hold for ever—perfect temperature, almost 80 degrees, yard work and time with the neighbors—there is a feeling in the air that drastic change is coming in a few weeks, maybe as many as ten weeks, but definitely the days of good weather and other the fence lollygagging are about over for this year. Mark A was over today, mowing yard and clipping some of the limbs off the plumb tree branches hanging over the ramp. Mark has finally completed the first book he has made from scratch—just about everything except the raw ingredients. He covered the covers with naugahyde, sewed the pages ito sections and then sewed the whole group of pages together into the main book. This is his first book and he is impressed with the document as am I. It has about 200 pages and he plan to use the volume for his journal. Mark is already planning his next volume, he has ideas for changes and things he will do differently. I appreciate Mark’s willingness to take on such a challenge and go forward and learn and complete then refine. I wish I had that kind of drive.
Today is Jessica’s birthday, Mark’s oldest child. We are planning on meeting at Café Rio for dinner and maybe even including Anakah.
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American Christmas

I wore my red coat today—I thought the Red coat was a bi heavy for today, after all it is Just September 2 and technically we are sill in the Summer season. The cold front is lingering and it was cool this morning when I left for work and I was glad Dianne had assisted I were the red coat. Its now lat in the afternoon and the day has struggled to clear 70 degrees. I did leave for a bit over lunch, outside over to the mall, the sun shining an comfortable enough but clearly the Summer has left and the crisp cool air seems to matching the ever earlier sunsets.

Back at work after four days off is kinda weird. I am struggling to get back into te swing of things. The boss is gone his week and I am not in charge and not being in charge is a good thing. Frank, The New guy, is and that makes perfect sense to me. Frank is actually 100 percent staff, he IS the book keeper and likes acting like the boss. So let him have, I have much more entertainment being just one of the guys.

Calls seemed up a little today and calls were interesting too.

The sore on my butt continues causing Dianne and myself great concern—the sores are just not healing so I have started the process of contacting my health care provider am trying to schedule an appointment to see my wound care specialist, Kevin,who has not yet returned my calls. Maybe tomorrow but that is cool, I am feeling pretty good for the time being. I just my butt wound healed up but Dianne has a host of questions she wants me to have my NP address and Dianne is right and I am just a chicken: afraid of the ‘boogy man’. I need o learn to be proactive, knowing that even if the they find something worthy of fear, they hopefully can intervene right there and then to mitigate the ultimate outcome and I really should welcome that outcome as opposed to being drug into the ER in excruciating pain to find-out the cause of the excruciating pain is terminal and worse could have been prevented. What a laugh that would be? Can you tell I am really trying to talk myself into this? Butt, we’ll see( did you like that joke?)

Best of all, FOX started their Fall season last night with Prison Break I not one of my favorites but new just the same, the rest of FOX and other networks kick off next week and the week after, thanks I m sure to the RNC. Thankfully, Gustav calmed them down a little but now Gustav is history I am sure those bunch of elephants will be coming back full bore—luckily not on FOX which is sort of surprising. I revealing truth to just how shallow I really am but the Fall TV season always excites me! The Fall season is truly the American Christmas. Forget December 15—Its all September with bright beautiful electronic gifts, magically over the airways, all month long into October--something for every one, young and old—the sweet, soothing tube of TV—god bless every one.

Happy Labor Day!!

This was the summer of Anakah—Dianne watched the child everyday and got her through tennis, swimming lessons and summer boredom which plagues every kid sometime during the summer. Anyway, in gratitude Gabe and Bridget had Dianne and over for steaks and coconut shrimp. Anakah had called earlier in the day and asked if she could spend the evening—it has been a long holiday weekend for Dianne and myself so we figured why not. Anakah was specific however, that we would have to ask at just the right time. We decided to go along with her plan.

The dinner was excellent; great steak and Gabe makes best coconut shrimp and garlic toast. The dinner was later in the day 5:30 p.m. right at the beginning of a major storm system which would plague us for the next 18 out so hours. We ate and visited and just at the right time Dianne asked if Ani can spend the night and the approval and between bands of rain, when the rain was falling at its lightest we raced for the van and headed home. The remainder of the evening was spent watching our storm and for Dianne keeping track of Gustav and Anakah watching her favorite videos. We did not really stay up late and I think everyone was in bed by 10:30—with no major incidents.

One of the traditions we have fostered over Anakah’s life is to have bacon and eggs when every she spends the night and Anakah often helps with the breakfast production. I get up about 600 a.m. and turn on NPR and prep for breakfast which I did this morning. I try to make enough noise that I wake Ani but not this morning. 7:00 a.m. came and went but I got the bacon fried, cheese for the eggs, grated and coffee made. When I called Ani and Dianne the wind had picked up and the rain started falling and the thunder started. Some lightening but not too much, is after we had eaten that the wind gusted and the rain turned to hail. The cold front pushed the temperature down significantly, and because before yesterday’s storm the temperature was in the 90’s so the heat in the house is not on. Dianne went back to bed to get warm and tried to get Ani to join her hoping to get the girl to get a little more sleep. Anakah would have nothing of that and slipped out of bed as soon as Dianne had slipped off into a stormy morning nap.

Ani was bored beyond tears beyond any relief of her animated videos. I figured the best cure was to keep her busy and decided to bake oatmeal cookies. Baking cookies turned out to be a much bigger project then I had figured. We spent an hour searching for the mixer, ingredients and finally had Anakah had to wake Dianne and ask her where everything was. We eventual found everything we needed. We had to pummel the hard brown sugar to get the sugar to a useable consistency, but soon we were mixing the butter, sugars, flour and the rest and by the time we were ready to put the cookies on the cookie sheets, Dianne was up and took over. What was supposed to be 18 soft cookies turned out to be 36 plus crisp oatmeal cookies but the cookies were better then I had anticipated. I had managed to keep Ani busy for over two hours, the storm had dissipated the sun had come out and though the temperature was in the 50’s the kids across the street were out playing in the water. Ani gathered together a paper plate of cookies and headed across the street to buy her way into the games. Happy Labor day everyone!!!

Oh, by the way, Dianne's mom is just fine-she weathered the storm just fine...

High Ground

I love the wind before a storm, a storm is coming into day and the wind is ripping through the trees out my front door. The temperature is cooler today, partly due to the wind and partial cloud either way it’s comfortable in my house today. I have the front door open and the sound of the gusting wind is great. I suppose this is not the same feeling to those in the Gulf Coast getting ready for the arrival of Gustov.

Dianne is from Louisiana and knows about hurricanes and she has family still Baton Rouge and Dianne is quite concerned. We have been following the storm’s approach for the past two days mostly on the INTENRNET since coverage by local medical has been sketchy at best. Local media has been all full our coming storms and the fires in the state.

I sometimes get a little smug when I see these catastrophes round the county, especially in places where the occur frequently and am quick to say, “why would any one live there” under their on volition. I think I am safe here in the Rockies, no hurricanes, twisters( rarely) and never of any consequence and occasional heavy snows—but even the snow is gone relatively quick. But, we are not so safe here, along the Great Wasatch Front. We are just biding our time. Sooner then later our water is going to run out—its just a matter of time. We do live in a Deseret and the only reason we have what we have is due to irrigation and some benevolent deep well, which are drying up. And then there is the “big one”. The City of Salt Lake is built on a major fault line, that according to all the geologists, is ready to slip and when the fault slips will liquefy the ground and most likely destroy a good portion of this city and surrounding area. We shrug our shoulders for the most part and increase our food and water storage and return to watering and mowing our yards and watching The Weather Channel and the Five-0-Clock news and wonder why those folks continue to live in Louisiana and Florida. I have sister who lives in Tornado Ally in Colorado and she has been wiped out a couple of time but contuse to live there and she is brilliant!

I guess home is home regardless of where one lives and you love where you live or you get out. You take what nature throws at you but your are thankful for all the other days you are blessed with beautiful sunrises and sunsets, winters with out snow or freezing temperatures and great tasting watermelons. The catastrophe hits, you look round and see who made it through, help your self and neighbors, where you can, and get on with your life. My mother-in- law lives in Baton Rouge, she is elderly and somewhat frail and many in the family are trying to get her to live her home and ride out the storm with them but Mom does not want to leave her home and move in with a bunch of youngsters who is all fussing and caring on. Mom knows what she is doing, she has seen it all before and she will get by one way or another after all like she has said numerous time “ I’m on high ground here. I’ll be just fine” then she winks and says good bye.