So Long Autumn

5

Tomorrow is Winter Solstice: the end of Autumn and the beginning of Winter but more important to me the beginning of the end of darkness. Beginning tomorrow the duration of sunlight will begin to lengthen each day. I know at first it is impossible to notice any change but just knowing this huge old ball of mud is beginning to tilt back up on its axis just makes me feel warm fortified with the knowledge Spring is just a season away.

I just got back from an extended lunch: three hours, the first of which I spent with members of the survivors club. These are former staff of the office I currently work. We try keep in touch and traditionally have a winter holiday lunch. Rather then usual five we had only three members the food was hot and relatively quick, the conversation was polite and with in the boundaries of our agencies. Our agencies are not necessarily adversarial but I can often feel when I am being probed for information. The last two bosses I have had at this agency have been fairly colorful and seems like everyone one out there is the disability community wants to know what the office is up to. Since I make it a point to know as little of the parent agency as possible, and still stay on payroll, I make less the stimulating dinning conversation. I drop a few tidbits here and there through the meal and everyone seems pleased. Everyone wants to know but few want to venture beyond the barriers of good taste so I remain fairly safe from any type of insubordination. The rest of the time I spent racing round downtown getting errands out of the way and trying to figure out what to get for staff for the holidays. I caved again on the side of simplicity. I got McDonalds gift cards in $5.00 denominations. I know the boss stops frequently at “the Arches” for breakfast and I know the new Program Manager does the same so the cards should work out fine. McDonalds is ubiquitous and I firmly believe everyone can find something they can enjoy at the Golden Arches for $5.00 or less. I got enough cards that I would have back gifts for those unexpecteds which always show up.

I noticed, while downtown, today I feel the season is beginning to wind down. People looked cold and tired as I passed them on the sidewalks or inside the malls. Yesterday afternoon, on an errand of mercy I noted that top brass at a number of state agencies I deal with wee already invisible for the holiday. Voicemails was all I was able to get claiming the now would be ouit of the office until the first of new year. Typical. The hustle and bustle of the season, I sensed, must have peaked Monday or Tuesday. Mercifully the sun was out and the ambient temperature in downtown Salt Lake did not feel nearly as cold as the thermometers read at 24 degrees.

I was just called by my suicidal chronic. She is alive and well. She has even moved and she said she would be die before she moved. I think she still has issues she is going to have deal with but she sounds happy and like she will survive. So, more Christmas miracles