Christmas Eve

 I would say as Christmas Eve go this has been somewhat of a benign Christmas Eve at best. No no that's not really true because it's been a very unique Christmas Eve. Last night I pooped a little bit just as I was going to bed I caught most of it in pads and such so there was not a mess made except for on me that wasn't very much cuz most of it went out and got caught on one of the pads. But it left me like I was feeling I was going to poop the rest of the mess all day today. I made it through the night I actually slept a little bit and was hopeful that Melissa would be able to come over and help me out. She kind of did at least said she was going to but couldn't be here till like 1:00 in the meantime Marc Anthony called to see if there's anything he could do and I him and I had and I finally said yeah I do need a little help and he came right over. In the meantime I called Melissa or texted Melissa and canceled our Meetup. I will not see her tomorrow as I usually do on Mondays because of Christmas. She is taking it off to be with her family which is good. I have somebody else which kind of makes me nervous cuz now that I have Melissa full time I'm pretty much used to her and her style of Home Care. Anyway back to the story, Mark did come over and did a great job of getting me out of the toilet and me doing my business and getting the materials out then getting me dressed. That was all accomplished by around 3:00 this afternoon so even had I wanted to do anything- - which I don't think I would have done anything today anyway this afternoon was gone and so was the day pretty much. I watched a little Marvel and sat in front of my heater for the rest of the day. For dinner I had cheese and crackers with green grapes. I still might have some cookies in yogurt to help settle my stomach. I totally believe in yogurt even if it's the pasteurized kind. I think if I believe in it hard enough it will do the job. I still have to pour the new juice into the old bottle which I will do tomorrow on Monday morning I have enough to get through the rest of this day to take my meds tonight with.

I keep getting e Christmas cards from my biological family I'm not really quite sure what to do with these folks. They certainly like reaching out and they want to reach me and pull me back into their biological grouping but I just don't feel anything there. I don't understand their need to group as a family. I don't know if Mom and Dad did such a good job with her patch up family that I don't feel in need for the other. Maybe I'll get the Christmas spirit washed over me during the night and reach out tomorrow at some point and wish everyone a very merry Christmas but I kind of don't think that's going to happen. That seems like Jasmine and Mark Anthony will be over tomorrow at some point in time drop off gifts. I feel kind of scuzzy because I haven't gotten anybody any gifts there's really no excuse except that I'm lazy and cheap. I mean I know I can't really get out to the stores- well I could have if I really wanted to even if it was just over to the dollar store or over to the polygament store I could have gotten stuff out I really wanted to. I feel kind of bad but not enough to do anything about it except for smiling wish everyone a happy happy Christmas then I see you around the building...