Posting confusion or Illusion?

 I don't know if any of you diligent readers noticed last night but I didn't post. Actually I did post but that was today because yesterday when I tried to post it wouldn't let me it said that I had run out of something as far as the software needed to be updated or something like that and I couldn't access my online blog. It was only this morning when I was searching for some other information that I realized that my blog that I dictated on this software it was also saved on to my main computer my big computer which I found didn't have a problem with finding my blog and updating it so what I ended up doing was copying yesterday's blog and pasting it into the blog online then changing the the dates so it looks like it's being posted the way it's supposed to as of yesterday's date. Now however before I started this blog tonight I went online with this device I'm using which is my tablet and I didn't have any problems getting on to my blog. Something happened between yesterday and today that's allowing me on to the log we'll see how well it posts tonight. If there's an issue I'll just have to post again tomorrow from my main computer system. But it's another example of not of mine not knowing enough to work out these kind of issues and problems then only by chance do I ever seem to get ahead. Pretty strange if you ask me. I really haven't felt well today not well enough to go out and do anything in the smog and it's probably just as well that I don't. I did go out at one time to take the garbage to the dumpster and it was pretty chilly I was surprised. The sun was out looked pretty nice actually there was a definite shell in the air that when I came back in to the apartment I felt off for the rest of the afternoon. I hope tomorrow that I'll be able to get up and feel good enough to cross the street over to the coffee shop and see what's going on with the folks over there and maybe once again sit at the long table who knows? I'm sure if that does happen it'll be the only place I go tomorrow just because the temperature still pretty chilly and the air still pretty dirty and though I don't claim to be one of those at risk population groups- - which I probably am being spinal cord injured as well as post 70 years old I should be more careful when I'm out and about and cloggy weather

Regarding the tablet that I'm using tonight. I picked it up somewhere this last summer I don't really remember where or when. It seems like I got it from somebody and they really didn't have a use for it any longer. It's supposed to be smaller but I've been able to save everything and I'm also saving things to the cloud so that's where the bulk of my posts are. I guess what I'm saying is that I need to start looking at getting another tablet that's up to date on all the pieces of software that I need to be up to date on. It all just seems like a lot of work…

One of those day

 Already I can tell it's going to be one of those days. One of the first things I did this morning was run over the latch release for my belt safety belt of my power chair of course it broke. Then like a dummy I thought I would check to see if the last record is still work and put the end into the broken end of the belt and of course it did snap together and work but now I cannot get it off and I can tell it's going to be one of those days where I'm going to have to get somebody on the outside to dislodge that locking mechanism. Of course, this happens right before I got dressed so I'm naked trying to get dressed with this safety belt secured across my belly. I think I'm going to be able to get the job done to the point where I'm somewhat presentable but I have yet to shave and finish getting dressed and I'm debating whether I need to go all the way uptown to you got to see if I can get this built released and a new belt put on. Or do I get somebody here at the building like Ted to undo the belt but I said I would have no securing device not that I use it that much but it certainly feels nice to have there. Of course I have a broken tooth that I need to have the dentist look at across the street as well as a meeting with Lori Brock at Starbucks this afternoon at 2:00. Yes, I think it's going to be one of those days I'm going to have to make some decisions people are going to have to live with my decisions and I would like to make everyone happy but I don't think that's going to happen. 

Of course the first part of this blog was written early in the day before I finally got going and started taking control of the situations that I was looking at. Fortunately I was contacted by Lori a little later in the morning indicated that she could not meet me for coffee which is fortuitous for both of us. She had undergone Dental work and was not feeling well at all which freed up my afternoon thank goodness. I called then the folks over at Utah Center for assistive technology and ask them if I should come in or how they would like to work with my seatbelt and sure enough they brought a seatbelt out to me and installed it while I was sitting here that was great interestingly I had some challenges early on when I was naked rolling around my apartment with my seatbelt on and couldn't get it off so I finally figured out how to take off the seatbelt that was quite frustrating I did get dressed finally and they came over and fix my seatbelt then I rolled over to the dentist's office. I was able to get in and have them look at my tooth and of course worst case scenario it was the tooth will have to be extracted and it will be in a couple days next week sometime cuz they have to get everything set up to do it it's going to cost almost 400 bucks it's amazing to me when I get myself into but as the day Drew to a close I'd gotten on most of the problems that I was facing that during the day and did okay I even went to the market and got some parfait and some potato salad. So the day didn't turn out too bad was certainly look good there to begin with though

Wednesday's Woe

 I don't know why but I've been craving clam chowder for the last week or so in fact I was actually thinking of jumping the bus and going downtown to Market Street Grill ordering a bowl they're clam chowder which I've always liked. I didn't really follow through with that idea however opting instead of going across the street to the market and purchasing a couple cans of chowder. Actually I got four cans of chowder two that were supposed to be very rich and two that were just traditional. I don't know what the difference is actually but I also purchased some breadsticks but they're not the breadsticks that I remember I couldn't find those kind. The breadsticks I wanted were long tubes of bread that are hard so they are crunchy. What I got was a fairly flavorful breadstick or Slender pieces of bread seasoned that if he toasted them you can make them a little bit more crunchy than they tend to be and they're okay actually. I would still rather have real corn sticks or breadsticks. I really got into the breadsticks right after my accident when my mom would bring up boxes of breadsticks for me to chew on while I was in rehab really haven't found them since but I really haven't looked until today one to have the bread sticks to go with my chowder. So I had chowder tonight during the news. I forgot to tell you that I had to get two cans of the chowder in order to take advantage of a sensational reduction in price maybe four cans actually cuz I got four cans. I have to be honest I was not totally impressed with the chowder. Seemed a lot more fishy than I remembered and now I have three more cans to go through. Maybe it's because I like the Chowder of the Market Street Grill better than the other chowders. I doubt if they make their own chowder to be honest with you I'm sure they have a industrial size can they open up every afternoon. Anyway I wasn't totally pleased with the dinner but it'll do the real Sucker Punch of the dinner was as I was eating I felt something weird on one of my teeth in the back I mean I don't have any teeth left as it is so anytime I feel anything strange the teeth I'd become very cautious something didn't feel right something felt loose and the very back tooth. Well I was eating luckily I didn't bite into it but I felt a stone like piece which I come to realize is a tooth that's broken off from the mother load and sure enough that was a small piece of tooth that came out of this tooth on the back of my mouth there's a big crevice it feels like that needs to be taken care of soon. Fortunately there is no pain associated with this giant cavity but I want to get taken care of soon hopefully before the upcoming holiday. As long as there's no pain of all I can get by even though it feels really weird you know how your tongue keeps going by back and feeling it up. If I have now three more cans of chowder to work through and I guess that's good. I doubt that the breadsticks will last perhaps if I store them somewhere dry after I toasted them they might last and I can use them with further cans of chowder. Right now I just have to get this tooth fixed ASAP.

Tuesday's funk

I don't know what's wrong with me but I just can't get motivated really to do much of anything right now. I want to blame it on the cold weather but I don't think that's really it. When I go out like I did today when I emptied the garbage couple times it was cold but it wasn't deathly cold. If I wanted to do something I would have gone out and done it but I just don't feel like doing anything unless I have to like a meeting or something like that that would get me motivated to get me up and out. Today's Tuesday that please typically I would be going into the city to do my assist meeting. But would not meeting this week and we're not meeting next week so after getting dressed and doing the breakfast I just sort of hung around the apartment. Later in the morning I actually did the bike ride the arm bike for an hour. This is my new thing where I try to get my arm bike ride done early in the day and the week freeing me up to do more stuff of nothing. I watch the new news and that was pretty much it for the rest of the day. I watched parts of a series on the TV plus ended up watching a movie later on. The high point with dinner that I made with one of the pork chops I had from you yesterday left over and a baked potato cut in half. I can use the rest of the potato half that I didn't eat today maybe tomorrow if I scramble up some eggs and spam and then chop the potatoes up inside the the eggs. Sad as it is I'm sort of like living to eat the high point of my day which is not a good thing. I'm doing okay with the apartment still relatively clean but it's beginning to break down into chaos. Maybe I can get Melissa to do some sweep up tomorrow in the kitchen where I've been preparing food and dropping things on the floor here and there. I've turned it up one frying pan and luckily I've been using paper dishes and plastic utensils which have been heaving into the garbage soon as I'm finished. A few more things that have been residing on the table away but certainly gives the semblance of order / cleanliness but it's just an illusion. Tomorrow's Wednesday so I have to do my own bike at some point in time again in the morning which will free up my afternoon. Since it's Wednesday that means Melissa will be here for my shower and such so that would make me get off a little bit later in the morning but hopefully I'll have the washing into the dryers and done by 1:00 or so the question is do I want to fold the clothes right then or wait till the afternoon or evening. Tomorrow there is a jazz game that I could use to fold clothes with. I have one more pork chop that I made the other day. There were three chops in the package. And I can bake another potato with the chop that would be pretty good. I like this chaps and stuff because it's a break from you know the Hispanic food that I tend to dwell on the frozen burritos, tortillas, hot peppers, Etc. I do love those flavors. I think I just need to Pace myself and get through this cold weather funk and into spring..

Monday's meander

 I just spent over 5 minutes trying to find the current year. For some reason I blocked what year were living in and when I went to find it on my tablet I could find the day and the date but not the year. It was only after I finally went to Google and ask specifically for the year that I got the number 2026. I know this sounds a little outlandish but it's true I get these blocks from time to time and I have to go to a source. I was just surprised at how difficult it was to find the whole date written out on the internet. There are times on waking when I have a difficult time assessing what the day is as far as Monday Tuesday Wednesday Etc. Sometimes it takes a while for things to snap into place. I sure hope this is not indicative of some major memory issue disability thing. Remember I talked about this a little bit yesterday when I woke and I couldn't remember exactly what I supposed to do that day and then finally I realized that I hadn't met with the kids over the weekend which meant that the day had to be Sunday and not Monday- - I was greatly relieved. I would have hate to miss breakfast with the kids.

Since it was Monday I needed some more fresh fruit. I had pretty much ingested a lot of the stuff I had going into the weekend. I needed some bananas and fresh grapes, at the very least. This of course necessitated a trip over to Macy's the closest market in my area. We're in that period of the year now where if it was a normal year we would have snow on the ground and it would be cold very cold causing inversions. Well we don't have snow this year but it's very cold and the same inversions are here but these inversions, to me, don't seem as drastic as the news media seems to talk about and in fact because there is no sun blockage it seems warm when you're out in the elements running from door to door or door to store and Back Again. I did wear my red jacket however Which is my semi heavy jacket that I wear but I just barely want to knock the heat out a little bit. It's fairly lightweight comfortable for me and easy to get into and out of but it looks pretty pitiful. When I wear my red jacket I do look like a hobo. I think I've talked about this before. I got my grapes as well as a bottle of my V8 juice, a bunch of green bananas and a few other items that I thought that I needed the only thing that I did not get that I really wanted to was some red parfait. I don't care if it was strawberry or cherry or raspberry but something red with the white stuff whether it's cottage cheese or whether it's whipping cream. Well my home health person, melissa, was getting things out of the cupboard this morning mainly her coffee cup I happened to spy a small box of gelatin or jello. I had Melissa said it aside and I've lightly searched for container to fix some Jello in now. I do have some of that spray can whip cream I don't know how well that would work if you're trying to make your own parfait seems like it should maybe it would be best just to shoot it on top and call it good…

 

Sunday's sentiments

 I have not really planned for a busy Sunday and I guess actually it was not that busy but Morgan that I anticipated. In fact I think I almost slept through the whole event of Sunday morning just because when I woke around 5:00 a.m. I really thought it was Monday morning. It took me awhile to figure out that I hadn't yet spent Sunday and then I better get going or I would be late for breakfast over at the usual restaurant. I was pleased though I was able to get out of the bed easily comparatively speaking as well as getting dressed but maybe 30 minutes to spare which is pretty good if you ask me. That's everything from shoes to straps around the legs. I did have some other physical challenges during the day but I'll get to those at another point in time. I had a few minutes at the restaurant before the kids got there. Jasmine and Jackson first then Marc Anthony came up later. It was quite a good breakfast with a lot of conversation and a lot of involvement. It was following the breakfast that I was really astounded that was when Jasmine and Jackson came over to the apartment and not only did they take the Christmas decorations down and strip the front door of the Christmas decorations but they also said about really putting some clean on the apartment. Washing dishes, washing the floor and straightening out a number of things that sort of gotten out of control in the last weak. It's not that they work really hard but they just seem focused and they get a lot done in the short amount of time leaving me with the feeling of a really clean apartment and probably Littles have been done actually. Actually a lot has been done. Don't want to short them for their efforts and assisted me to become more acceptable. What's finished with the apartment the kids are gone and I was once again on my own. I guess I was tired but I reverted back to my basic Behavior of trying to find something to decent to watch on what are the streaming platforms. Enjoyed some animation Toy Story I've always enjoyed that particular piece and then a couple of the segments of one of the series that I'm currently involved in. I watched one episode twice before I realized that there were no episodes left to watch until they release another one next week probably. Unlike a lot of these series when they drop episodes to drop them off for one season and you can watch the whole all of them all at one time if you want but this one is actually just two episodes into the season and watch the episode twice and it was beginning to the third time that I really liked that this is getting pretty repetitive. So I'll just have to keep my ear to the ground and see when they drop the next episode.

Other than these events that's pretty much but it for the day. I actually ended up watching the complete Dune movie, one of my favorites. I was doing this while trying to keep my bowels from moving. It's Sunday night and I have a poop since Friday morning and I think I'm due. I'm going to try to make it through the night since Melissa shows up tomorrow morning and if I do have an issue or a problem she can clean me up then. I'll go ahead and wrap myself up in red pads and plastic sheeting pads in hopes of mitigating any issues I might have. I was a little worried about this one I looked at the results I produced on Friday and there wasn't much at all in the pot so that means that other proof had to be somewhere and I think I found it in the colon and just hope that I can contain as much as possible until tomorrow then I should be okay

The long table- finally

 I did not intentionally start out to realize one of the goals I've had in mind for the last couple of months but it just happened quickly before I knew what was going on. I've gotten up quite early this morning not being able to sleep but I was able to get up get dressed and even make my breakfast in time to get over to the coffee shop much earlier than I usually do. It was actually somewhat sparse population wise when I got there in fact all the small tables that I usually sit at were taken. The big table where the guy said that I quasi envy was open so I scooted up to the edge of the table and put my coffee there and started screwing through my cell phone - - as I usually do. I suddenly surprised when the crew started coming in sitting down at the table. Sad all around me and one of them even said hi to me but they sat around me like I belong there I was kind of shocked. The blonde lady which has been very cordial to me over the last couple months came in later on with her husband and sat down and she welcomed me there as well. I was pretty surprised but I was messing with my cell phone and listen to the conversation which I thought was pretty interesting. Luckily for me these are they seem to be Democrats and so they had quite a discussion on events from the ice agent who shot / murdered the individual the last couple days the general rants on the president and all that he's been up to in doing. It's quite surprised a lot of them talked and spoke of all the trips they had taken as far as places they had been in other parts of the world that seem to have dovetail with the conversations that we were talking about at the table. One of the folks indicated that they were employed by the state of Utah which made me perk up a little bit and introduced myself to him and we had a pretty decent conversation we knew a lot of the same people which I thought was pretty cool. I still felt quite out of place and I never really did get comfortable in this setting but it certainly was a big step up for me I thought. Now I don't know what I'm going to do next week should I take a spot at the table or go back to my small table if one is available? That'll make me look so strange one way or the other.

My older brother called me today. We've been playing phone tags for the last couple of weeks and he had mentioned in one of his messages he left that he had been having to go back and forth to the Veterans Administration Hospital where he gets all of his health care. Finally he advised me that he had cancer a house cancer I don't know if he's told me this before I wasn't sure I just didn't know how bad it was the thought maybe it was getting worse. It's not necessarily getting worse but it's still takes a lot of time on his part to maintain his level of action as far as maintaining taking care of himself. He's not in any pain there's only uncomfort is all the time it takes away from his hunting and going out with his son fishing and such. It's difficult for me to communicate with him because he's such a Republican if he is that he certainly not a Democrat that's for sure and so I have to endure a little bit of racist comments and such. But he is my brother and I got to stick by him

Free lunch good times

Even with Big Bright Beautiful sunshine it was still cold almost unbearable cold for me- - I know that's a little dramatic but it's pretty damn chilly that's for sure. I only went out once today which was to take some stuff to the dumpster and it's a pretty short Dash from the back door of the building to the dumpsters and back but it was cold enough to make me want to stay in for the rest of the day. Luckily my friend Dwayne came over for lunch. Remember, we are supposed to go out to lunch yesterday but something came up I know you rescheduled. Asian food, I dare not call it Chinese food anymore cuz it's not the Chinese food I remember but this certainly Asian lots of vegetables beef cut a certain way certainly Asian which I totally enjoyed Dwayne paid for it as usual. I'm such a chump I let my friends buy my lunch all the time. I got tired of them saying no every time I try to make a feeble attempt to pay for the meal. That's okay these guys make more money than I do so I'm not too bummed out and again please more for the time spent visiting as opposed to eating. I've known Dwayne for about 30 years he was working with Utah State Office of Rehabilitation and had to come to our office Periodically. I first saw my job with this guy as a way to infiltrate the Mothership of rehab. There was a long battle that went on for a great while at the beginning of the independent living movement as a IL centers established themselves. There is this struggle for control over there existence. Of course rehab wanted to do as much control as possible and the independent living folks wanted to control their own lives. I don't know anymore who was right or wrong. I really like the adversarial role as far as fighting the establishment. And we are all in it for that. Over the years however we've learned to live with ourselves I think and even though I saw Dwayne as a plant from the Mothership I grew to like the guy then after years and years of work and retirement we still hang out. He looks after me I appreciate that he's not overbearing or controlling or anything like that but I think he genuinely likes to hang out with me I don't like hanging out with him he makes me look good. He ended up going to be in a bigger dog in the state government after he finished with rehab which was I thought cool. The best of all he picks up the bill…

 

Coffee social

I don't know if it's the weather or it's Thursday the last part of the week hopefully tired today. No reason to go out so I basically stay inside the apartment wondering up to the front a couple times checking the giveaway table mail today and I've gotten so I really ever check the mail twice in the same week. Maybe I'm feeling anxious I can't really say and I think it also is the after holiday let down as far as getting back into the year. Actually I was supposed to go to lunch today with Dwayne but he called and had to cancel so we rescheduled for tomorrow. Maybe that's why I was feeling the world interesting. But I filled the time fairly productively did my arm bike and thank goodness it's Thursday because I don't have to go the whole hour I only have to do 20 minutes usually on Thursdays to get my 200 minutes for the week. I felt I earned a little time this morning so I started a Stephen King novel on Netflix the one about the JFK assassination of the guy who tries to prevent the assassination. I thought sure I had read this novel but maybe I have not that's pretty rare. It's okay but I don't think they're going to finish the the book in the eight sections they have online or on Netflix. They'll probably have a second season. I mean you have an endpoint you have to meet if you're going to get to 11:22/63. Parts of it I remember so I think I have read it especially the part about the hamburger where the cook has been going back in time to pull out real hamburger and bring it forward to serve it as the restaurant. I would much rather just do a whole movie and get the series over with in one sitting versus dragging it out over 8 hours. And then I know they're going to jerk me around by doing another a second season. So far I've been good about only watching one or two episodes a day. I don't want to binge the whole thing in one day I'm about ready to do episode 4 I think. I think I'm really watching too much flat screen. If I was strong I would be writing but I just can't seem to bring myself to that position. I need to do it soon if I'm going to do it at all because time is getting short regardless of how optimistic I want to be. Today was the first coffee social of the new year. It was not badly attended but seemed a little tired all things considered. The best part about coffee social is that takes a fairly decent chunk out of the morning and it also gives you something to talk about that you did that day. So coffee social is great. I went out I socialized with the group as well as consumes some fairly decent coffee. Not World Class by any means always out of a can nothing ground or anything like that. But with enough creamer and Sweet and Low icon myself into thinking it's pretty darn good coffee.

 

Something's happening here..

What is going on? I was about ready to start blogging, I had rolled into the bedroom and found my tablet and just as I was screwing through some videos and such my inbox pretty much blew up with information about a shooting not far from this building down the road the number of blocks. Two people dead six more seriously injured and this in the shooter is not been procured. And this is just like every night now it seems like there's something like this locally! Let alone on the news there's all kinds of reports of similar situations not only by individuals but by Ice agents killing aliens to this country a lot of them illegal but some of them very legal and being deported and in some cases outright shot and killed. Like I said usually this kind of stuff doesn't make it into my blog since it's so universally I think acted on by individuals but it's bothered me to the point that I thought I would just make a couple comments regarding the whole mess. And it does not seem to be getting better actually it seems to be getting worse.2 Interestingly today and then PR on the local section they sort of indicated that things are getting somewhat better fewer murdered that this year ending in 2025 than last year. It seems like there was some form of Hope but I don't think so now. Maybe it's the w I don't know. Of course I want to go right to what do you mean the Republican party and particularly Mr Trump that's too easy and maybe the lazy way out. I think if I were to do that I would be correct. What would really be scary would that be what if my job was to interact and make the situation better act as an agent of friendliness an agent of peace. I don't know if I could pull something like that off or not that would be weird. But change for the good would be for someone person Having the courage to be downright friendly person to other people all the time regardless. I think a whole lot of people would have to change to bring this about. Sometimes I think, I really think people like what is happening they like it just the way that it is that's why this guy got elected in the first place by a group of people who want to have this kind of violence and we separated from all other individuals that are not like them. I think that's it really so I don't know if there's a chance for us or not. Unless we have to go through a total breakdown of systems to Rise Like a Phoenix out of the ashes

Supposedly a storm is coming in tonight starting with rain which should turn to snow later on tomorrow morning sometime. I don't know if I believe the local weather people anymore but they all seem terribly excited about the possibility. I screwed around area this afternoon trying to take advantage of the decent weather before the front moves in. I went to the market again and spent another bunch of money on yogurt vegetables fresh stuff, enough stuff that I won't have to go out again for a couple of days in case there is snow in the snow gets piled up in the gutters and on the sidewalks and then piles. Sometimes it's better just to lay low..

 

Tuesday's take

It happened again, and I really should know better, but I had a perfect idea for my blog tonight and got excited when I fired up the tablet and got caught up in snippets on Facebook or other apps that just fire at you in different Snippets of what look like interesting videos and soon not only have I forgotten what I was going to write about but I also wasted good time that I could be doing something else like getting ready for bed. Why am I so weak?

It's Tuesday so I went into assist meeting today. We hardly had any names to process which is okay. I mean it would be better to have a lot of names to make me feel like I'd gotten something done but for me it's just the tension of getting up getting ready and going into the city for the meeting. We always do a lot of chatter before we really start the meeting. I think we waste a lot of time but that's just me however the concept of tithing settlement came up. Tithing settlement is an LDS concept it's where you go in and meet with the bishop for an interview at the beginning or end of every year and one of the items you discuss is have you paid a full tithe or 10% of all your earnings for that year. It's really kind of a brutal process at least I used to think it was I still do actually. I don't quite remember why but we went as a family or at least the we boys and my dad went. And I remember feeling embarrassed for my dad as he would squirm and reiterate his earnings over the year to the bishop. My dad didn't think it was a bad deal at least I don't think he did it never really verbalized it if he did did. He just figured it was one part of being a Mormon and it was time to settle up. You had to go to settlement because if you didn't you didn't get a recommend for that year, a temple recommend and that's important to the run of the mill dedicated Mormon who wants to do the temple work or feels he has to do the temple work. I don't know it was a challenging half hour or longer measurement of time. Or maybe it just felt longer because we had the piece together all the paperwork my dad would put together for the meeting in front of the bishop so the bishop could go over and make sure that everything was a okay. Sure disturbs me to think about this now. I'm just glad I don't have to go through anything like this or put my kids through anything like this.

The cold weather is coming back and that's good matter of fact there's even a chance for snow in the next couple of days. Snow coming down to the valley floor. I doubt we will get as much as the weatherman talks about we seldom do and luckily, for me, the snow is not going to last as long as it usually does because a warm front looks like it's coming down on the heels of this cold storm. Each day now we get closer and closer to Spring and that's a good feeling…

 

Monday's musing

It's not even half-time and the Jazz are already behind more than 10 points. I'm not beside myself but I didn't have any problems whatsoever turning off the remote coming into the bedroom to write my blog because there's nothing to do watching the Jazz. Maybe after I finish the blog I'll tune in on the internet and I found that the Jazz have a little app that keeps track of what's going on during the game. I could be doing something else besides wasting time watching this group of kids find themselves. Don't give me wrong I don't really not like the Jazz just the only damage yourself so much watching these people lose with the finesse that these guys do. Maybe the coach does have this long-range plan that is cultivating these guys into some sort of magic winning machine but I don't think it's going to be this year and I don't know if I have enough time left on this planet till they do become a major winning team. And bottom line it doesn't really matter. I'm get somewhat dismayed looking at the commercials during the Jazz breaks. This is definitely a sport aimed at the more wealthy people in this state. They regularly show homes that have like small basketball courts in the Attic where kids go up and play when they're dismayed out of school grade or something. They talk about the vehicles they used to go from one sport to another sport high-end Sports like going from skiing to the Jazz game and Back Again. And granted, there are a group of folks that do this but they aren't the main group of folks I don't think and certainly not me.

It was another day of dark leaded clouds. Another day I really didn't get out and do anything except run to the market to pick up a few items firstly to get me through the game tonight but now that's the thing of the past. Picked up some firm green grapes and actual bag of oranges they look a little hammered but I find that makes the best oranges to eat. They've had time to build a lot of sugar. They try to sucker you into buying the big Naval oranges but I found from a bitter experience that when eating the oranges, the navels you have to cut through very thick peels to get to the pretty small orange itself. Still I do like a good orange and even if they are hammered they're still 90% sweet most the time. Sometimes I get a dark inside that's ugly and deposing and just playing rotten. Now I just have to remember to plug in my charger before I go to sleep tonight. My batteries are failing to the point that if it shows I'm down just 5 or 10 points if I don't plug in my chair for sure I'll be draining the batteries I roll around tomorrow going downtown to my assist meeting. And if I don't charge I'll be riding in the red zone coming home with the possibility of stopping all together. I've never drained the battery so low that they refuse to move the chair I should however treat my chair better especially the batteries. I think I drew a lucky card however. Listening to the news and weather tonight it looks like the cold low pressure system has moved on and even though it'll be cold tonight and that the temperatures will drop to 30° so it's freezing it should be no clouds tomorrow. I have to drive into the city for my assist meeting in my red jacket making sure my shirt is pulled down

 

Sunday breakfast as usual

 It was good to get back into the routine this morning of breakfast at the local restaurant. It's the same place that we go to every week but things have been sort of mixed up the last couple weeks cuz of the holiday season and such. But today felt like just natural stuff except the grandkids didn't show which is cool. That gave my son and me time to ourselves to visit which is cool as well. We are sucked in Cloud wise but it was fairly warm for January and so rolling down to the restaurant wasn't a problem I didn't even wear a jacket just a long sleeve shirt and a muffler around my neck. The scar for Muffler does keep me warm but the same time I use it to mop up any sweat that might accumulate because of stress my body's feeling somewhere. I think I've discussed this a little bit before is that when the spinal cord injury is having pain below the lesion level it often shows itself as sweating around the neck and head. I don't sweat a lot but just enough that that makes the collar damp and in the winter time that's a drag because then that does feel like it's pretty cold but if I have something to absorb the sweat then it's not so bad. And most the time I don't sweat at all I just have that as precautionary tool in case I do need to drive my neck. The restaurant we go to is a D's restaurant and it's okay but it's just basic basic and when you've gone to the places many times as we have I think we're getting a little bit tired of the joint except for it's convenience. There is another restaurant just down the street from these but it's a Hispanic restaurant but they seem to have some sort of breakfast menu and we're thinking of maybe trying that next week to see how well that goes. My son says it's just breakfast fixings rolled up in a taco of some sort and he's probably right but at least it would be something different and something which might be a little bit of fun to try. Aside from the trip down to the restaurant I did stop on the way back to my apartment at the coffee shop that I usually go to on Saturday mornings. I didn't go yesterday because I was having such a problem trying to dress myself that took so long that I had just lost any interest in going out after I'd gotten dressed. This morning however I had enough time in the weather was nice enough that I did Veer over to the coffee shop and got a large cup of coffee which would last me the whole day so I don't have to make coffee till tomorrow morning before Melissa gets here. I really didn't have any problems getting dressed this morning. I did however get up 15 minutes earlier than I do usually on Sunday mornings just in case of things did go awry I would be able to build a little extra time into the dressing procedure. But I was careful on everything especially making sure I was seeing all the way to the back of my chair and not slanting forward which makes it very difficult to cross my legs to put on my pants and my shoes so that went along very well and I was ready to go half an hour before I need to leave the apartment so all is well this Sunday and I'm fairly pleased as I slide into the new year.

Sizing up Saturday

One of my largest fears regarding losing my Independence is that all happened just overnight, sort of like a stroke or something. This morning I was beginning to think that it happened. My right side arm if not arm the shoulder arm mechanism whatever it's been really painful lately I think I sit weird in my chair push it on some kind of a nerve or something and that has caused that whole side to be somewhat lacking as far as support goes. It took me a while to get up this morning but I eventually did and it took me a bit longer to even get myself squared away in my chair just because I didn't have but seem to be enough strength on my right side. It wasn't so much the strength as there was pain in my right side which did not allow me much ability. I didn't go to coffee because it took me forever to get dressed but I eventually did even doing up my pants shorts. I was so bummed out at that time I spent the rest of the day binging on a series that I'm watching right now. So it's a bit embarrassing but I didn't get a lot of accomplished today but as of this evening the arm is somewhat better A lot better actually pain wise. I'm really hoping tomorrow I'll be able to get up get dressed out to the restaurant on time to have breakfast with the kids. Maybe it's good to have these intervals of non-independence to realize that the end is near and that I need to start making preparations. Like I don't know what I will do when and if that time comes, it's not if the time is going to come. I just have to be adult enough to start exploring the results of the end game.

Our friend president invaded Venezuela today! I usually don't bring in National or international events on my blog just because they're just so big. However this one may have an impact on me because Mark Anthony has been so focused on what will happen to me if things go down. I don't know if he knows or realizes how significant the president's efforts in this area might be as far as how people will be impacted by his efforts. This goes to a certain degree with the first paragraph  about my messed up arm. So things really get nasty when were the other how am I going to deal with this how am I going to get dressed in the morning I'm going to do my ADLs the whole ball of Wax  the whole thing does kind of freak me out. 

Podiatry visit and dreams of Summer

 It's a brand new year I'm still having difficulty in the 26th for the 25 used to be. So I'm still having to learn the new year. I know that sounds terribly basic but it's true. You know what they say about the new habit are learning to do have it you got to do it x amount of times before it becoming wrote memory. So that's my task for the next week or so especially when I'm doing blog updates. I think my first real trip the new year today I had to travel South to my podiatrist for the toenail thing. I really should discontinue this guy but he's just so nice and even though the trip is quite challenging at times especially weather that's less than ideal I think the challenge is good for me. Today actually the weather was fairly good even though it was overcast and somewhat damp it was actually fairly warm especially when the Sun broke through the clouds making me glad I was on this trip. The podiatrist rarely spends more than 10 minutes with me doing my toes and that period of time we assess each other's lives in the last 6 weeks. There's usually a national holiday or season in between sessions giving us something to visit about. I enjoy hearing about his familial life, the trips he takes with his family. I sort of fantasize Life as a real professional. This guy is actually a foot serving and he does actual surgeries especially now with the kid who is just graduated from Podiatry School if that's what it's called. It was interesting he indicated that surgery wasn't that interesting to him anymore but what was interesting was doing surgery with his kid. I thought that was kind of cool I could really identify with that sediment. But like I said really more than 10 minutes whereas I'm usually there in the office or slash room maybe 20 to 30 minutes waiting. Today our Podiatry session was quick. I was really pleased because I was able to catch the return bus almost immediately, so I didn't have to wait too long in the cooler weather or just wait at all. As soon as I got home I cranked up the heat of my room heater and just enjoyed my apartment for the rest of the day. I found a potato in the cooler at the bottom of the refrigerator and I had steak that I cooked the other day so that'd have protein over the holiday. I found a series on Netflix that I started watching a long time ago. I recognize that I've seen these episodes but I don't remember them at all plus there's two or three seasons that I didn't bother to watch at all. I know I'm going to be somewhat stressful and when I get to the end of season 3 and there will be the inevitable cliffhanger and we'll get the word that they've stopped production on the series I hate it when that happens. But right now I've got hours and hours to watch that really is something to look forward to as a animal forward towards spring and summer...

New Year's Eve save

My caregiver thinks that I ate something bad yesterday at some point in time you're a need to poops around 10:00 9:30 or 10:00. I ended up calling Melissa just because I cramps are so bad I knew I was going to have a poop bomb any second. Luckily I was able to hold off until she got here around 10:30 or 11:00 we got me in on the toilet. I dropped a few plops on the floor but my enlarge I got everything in the toilet it was all liquid anyway. I was so glad that Melissa was able to come over at a moment's notice. She did bring her son with her which is good. I think he is a very good protection piece even though he's very young he's very large stock of a south sea Islander large. I was still feeling unsure of myself when Melissa left so we wrapped me up pretty well and adult diaper and bed sheet protectors so I made it through the night with just a little squirt that I didn't even realize until getting up and pulling the protective sheets off of me did I see I squirted somewhere during the night not enough to hurt the beds or sheets or anything like that. I'm not sure what I ate that did this to me. The caregiver thinks it's the hamburger stew or hamburger chili that dish I made that I didn't have the chili powder for I have been eating on that quite a bit last couple days and it very well could be that I guess it's set out for some time but I thought there was enough vinegar from the jalapenos that took care of any growth issues that might have come about but obviously something happened. So today I've been trying to replenish the fauna in my gut. I've been eating almost non-stop it seems like. Yogurts, a couple chicken legs, toast and a couple of spoonfuls of the concoction. Well Lisa was waiting on me last night to get done she actually put together a fairly decent concoction. It doesn't have as much jalapeno juice cuz I would like but still it's good to have the container full again. I want to let my stomach settle down a little bit further before I really get back into the concoction concept. Both Melissa and I feel the concoction made for some fairly decent poops.

Today I've been okay I've been sort of taking it easy kind of I've been working on getting the kid Letters Out and that's been a real challenge. Please however that I was able to print the envelopes no problem. I didn't even need to do the labels but I'm glad I did get the labels and now kind of know how to use them. They only letter I wasn't able to get with Charlie's and I'll try to do that tomorrow. What I was printing letters for some reason I could not get my handheld to print the Charlie letter. However tonight when I tried to pull up the Charlie file it came up just fine and this morning it would not load to save my life and I spend at least an hour trying to coax it to come up it never did so I gave up on it printed and mailed everybody else's document the Charlie's and maybe I can get that out tomorrow.