Wednesday's hump

 I wish I cared more I really do but truth of the matter is I really don't except for I don't want to hurt these people's feelings cuz they're both very special to me. Both of these individuals have has been my caregiver and one still is the other is just a friend now but she does a great cleaning job. I wish I could say that she is my regular person but I don't really have a regular person that comes in and cleans the apartment. So every couple of weeks or month or so I called G. when I need to have her come over and dig out my apartment. G .has a number of issues as well going on in her life all the time and she needs somebody she can talk to so is she cleans the apartment we visit and enjoy each other's company. M. who is my current caregiver and has been for some time and as I foresee it will be my caregiver for some time in the future hopefully she does a great job, she's dependable and she's fun to visit with. She also picks up and cleans around the apartment from time to time when it's a desperate need. I see  three times a week and  does such a good job of picking up sweeping and such on a hit and miss basis that it defeats me from actually going out and finding a real life cleaning person to come in on a regular basis. The reason I bring this up is that this morning as I was sitting on the commode doing my business I got a ping or two on my cell phone. I don't keep my cell phone with me cuz they're just as any place convenient to place it when I'm sitting on the toilet. Anyway, it was a message from G. indicating what time she would probably be over to do some cleaning. I had to have  pick up my cell phone when it peeing because it was on the bed and bring it over to me. She looked at the messages and saw that was G.. They both work for the same caregiver company. And she asked if G. was coming over to clean and I said yes. Then there was a bit of a silence not much but I wasn't sure how M felt about G., oh I think she likes G. a lot actually, just why I was she coming over to clean. It was okay I usually have M go through my messages when they come like this and lets me choose the ones I want to address right then if it's important. That was all however. I really don't think M really cared one way or the other except how come I didn't have her do more cleaning. We've never discussed it I just have never really considered M on a real home cleaning person bases she just has too much going on and I want to keep her available for the really important needs I have such as being around and cleaning me up after I poop explosion. She's just the best that way. Like I said I don't think anything is an issue right now and I doubt will be. I just get nervous on long pauses…