Fork In the Road

I got one of those calls this morning. You know a call that lets you know something that you just as soon not know, something you should know and possibly take some action on—but something I don’t necessarily want to take action on. This morning Maree called. Maree used to be my partner in this office. Maree now works for a private non-profit legal outfit here in the city doing very similar work as I do out of this office: information and referral and case preparation. Maree called to let me know of a position which is currently open and one she thinks I could fulfill.

I have known about this position for a couple of weeks now. A buddy, Andrew, I ride on the train with time to time has also let me in of the position being available. Andrew and Maree both are very concerned about me and my current position since the money I operate off of has become very, very soft an maybe non existent after this year’s legislature completes it’s cutting and blood letting. Something is going to happen I just don’t know for sure how what happens will affect me. I probably should be more proactive.

And even if I could “look round he corner”, and see that my current position were to be eliminated I don’t know if I would consider going over to the Law Center. I cannot believe I am saying this but I really don’t have a lot respect for law center—and why would I worry about respect if it meant a paycheck? But I do. I know how my staff feels about the center and I also know how other staff feels and I cannot see myself part of that organization. But, there is always the idea of ‘what if your working there could make that operation better”? Could I be part of the solution instead of part of the problem? I guess interview for the position and turn it down, but that does not sound right and fair but it feels like I should be doing something.

So here I am at a fork in the road I could go one way or another. Continue on with State employment for as long as I can—I have over ten years in the system or jump to a private non-profit and have to start on a completely new career track or worse do nothing and risk unemployment , benefits and boredom or put in for my social security and start retirement: late nights and sleeping in and taking life easy. I really don’t what this life style because I have seen too9 many others drop dead six months after slipping into retirement. So, I think I’ll let the position go and hang on to this for as long as I am able and if the worse case scenario happen I’ll just nose round till something else opens up, or better yet make some for myself. I am sure I can always get a gig doing telemarketing or something.