Fleeting Images Of days Gone By

The above picture was taken about 20 years ago to retake year or two. I'm sure I was in my 30s then possibly my early 30s and into the math but what's the difference at this point the point I want to make is that I want be back in that picture I want that picture to be me on that picture, be now but it's not. The image of a version of who I used to be. I don't know why I picked this image except for I felt very good in this image. I mean I could've picked an image of where I was still walking, but I was still able-bodied, when I was swimming, swing from trees and dropping canals, riding motorcycles and have the time of my life. But I did not choose those images and chose is one of me and Dianne and this picture of me holding my arms in victory. Didn't matter to me that half my body didn't work on more than half my body didnot workwhat mattered was the parts that did work worked pretty darn good and loud need to be independent, self-reliant and happy. I love to be able to be in his pitcher today two of the ticket a few hours ago. But a few hours ago I was being lifted by Benjamin, a higher guy whose job it is to get people out of their beds dressed and ready for the day or conversely undress a person, do it that person needs to have done to them and throw them to bed until the next morning. I think this is called assisted-living excuse the pun on living. I think of all the new things that this new trauma has brought to my life my reliance on the healthcare industry and more specifically the attendant care aspect of the industry has been most challenging. Having to rely on someone to come into your house take and take your clothes off wash you down and address you up. I pay these people by the hour I consider it takes me an hour to get me up in an hour to put me to bed comes out to about 50 bucks a day. This is where the biggest drives I have two get my left side working again and being able to somehow, on some level take care of myself once again. I may not be able to do this in which case I would have to rely on this forever for however long is. Wow. Unbelievable. But you know what? I'm still alive in this morning and Benjamin left after putting on my pants and getting me in the power wheelchair and watching me shave I realized that I was happy. Somehow – – probably thanks to Dianne somehow – – were pulling this off. Soon, I believe I'll be back on the bus going back and forth to outpatient therapy where I'll be working on my week left side and strengthening my body in general and hopefully just hopefully getting close to the picture up above of when I read both arms in victory of being alive and taking care of myself.