It's the day after the Fourth of July
obviously, Sunday and overcast day for once. The blaring some is
blocked and the temperatures are not nearly as high as a have been a
bit of reprieve from the heat we've been suffering from. There I go
suffering? I don't think I'm suffering it's hot but I still think I
enjoy it even though I have to be careful, I have to cover my head
and I need to drinking lots of water.
The holiday was kind of fun actually. I
was excited I got up or staff got me out and got my meds then
proceeded to make the potato salad for yesterday's dinner. I was
excited to have a holiday and somewhat celebrate the holiday. Dianne
did some serious barbecuing chicken, steak and bratwursts. I was
devastated to find out yesterday that our neighbors actually neighbor
Lanae Lost her son a few days ago actually exactly 2 days ago! This
is the third family death for her in two years. Her husband in both
sons that ago. I finally went out visit with her briefly yesterday
afternoon. She seems pretty good spirit wise. Perhaps she's just
given up any happiness per se – – however I know this son
sometimes wore her out. Maybe she's just learning to roll with the
punches, she just been punched so much lately I can't stand see here
anymore pain.
It's kind of weird this has been a
season of death between Steven death and Jack's death earlier bummed
out season so I think there are two funerals will have to attend this
coming week. I will still guilty yesterday trying to enjoy the
holiday but I did a little bit. Still it was weird. Bridged called
later and afternoon and she and gave decided goal to Evanston to
watch the huge firework show that Evanston puts on. It's a 2 Hour
drive. Of course even if I could've participated like being able to
have a vehicle to go over there and I could not because I had to be
in bed by 9 o'clock or staff comes in o'clock from the bed. My whole
life now is dictated by what I need to have done for me. I'm trying
not to let it get me down. I'm still trying to pack everything and to
my hours of consciousness for have to go to bed at 8 o'clock.
One last item this morning and have to
call Carl and see if he'll still get me up in the mornings as opposed
to having staff come in to do so . We are thinking at least three
days a week are for if he can do it this would help save a little
money that we are intending to put towards home health if and when I
have my next surgery. I don't know seems like too little but at least
will save some money. I feel like such a wet blanket in the lives of
my family and friends. A well it's the only cards that I've got to
play
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