Happy New Year!!

Happy New Year! We past a quiet new Year’ Eve, watching a few movies and giving it up at 11:00 and going to bed. I went right to sleep only to be woken at midnight to the noises of New Years. I really wanted to explode my illegals which I have been holding the past couple of years but no, not this year. Maybe next year if I am lucky enough to live another year.

Earlier in the day we dropped by my brother’s house a couple of blocks from my house. Gabriel had dropped Anakah early in the morning to watch. Dianne had a doctor’s appointment at 8:30 and we were out the door as soon as she had arrived for the medical center for Dianne’s tests. When we had finished with the hospital Anakah—I think desperately searching for something to do with another little person rather going back to the house and the fossils of her grandparents for the rest of the day. She has a cousin who is watched by my sister-in-law similar to how we look after Anakah many days. So with this in mind Anakah “strong armed’ us to stop my brother’s home and see who was available. Her cousin was not there, one of the few that she would not be but Anakah wanted to visit with Jean, my sister-in law, who I believe , Ani believes is “back up” grandmother. I stayed in the van, of course, I really cannot access my brothers home independently, without a lot of processing, we really cannot o the “pop-in” but that’s cool.

The sun was brilliant yesterday, the last morning of the year; the sun heated the inside of the sealed van, so staying in the van was not too difficult a duty. I was bout ready to dive into my back pack and find my new book when I was startled my Carl pounding on the window and motioning for me to roll down the window. I was pleased to see him and we started visiting. I have not really visited with him for over a year now and found the action of talking with him enjoyable. I would like to think we are close as brothers go, but I could be delusional. How much we really know each other is really a question which I wan to explore this year. Anyway—the cold air finally forced Carl into the van but we continued to chat and I was a bit surprised as our conversation turned to death…ours. Carl is new retired, the last three months and is learning to be retired. Carl still rises early every day as he always did when he worked. He does the “honey-dos” and home project he has not been able to get to but even those been completed. He is taking one of his grand sons every morning to school and that is cool and even with that he is searching for his new place in his new life. But Carl is more and more aware that he is getting to the end of his life. I was a little surprised to hear him speak of his demise so casually. I know I have been having the thoughts more and more: “cremation VS burial”, what kind of service, what music or speakers, DNR or no DNR—can I afford a long medical battle if I needed to. What happens if I have a stroke or worse same with Dianne interesting questions. Carl has been have the same What will the end be like? It was interesting to hear what my older brother’s thoughts on this topic was and that thoughts were not so different then mine. But perhaps more important was just being able to visit with a brother I have with for a long while. Happy New Year!!