$20 poop!

 I hate not being able to transfer myself on and off the toilet- - like I used to. Can't believe how independent that I was. Of course I'm moaning about this because I'm sitting I think on a pile of poop, not sure yet but it kind of feels that way and I have been cramping this afternoon. It's getting later in the evening and it's so difficult trying to contact anybody without a cell phone I'm just going to hack it out until tomorrow morning when Melissa will come. I'll be okay just wrap myself up in pads. Once I'm laying down I think I'll be fairly safe. Like I said I'm not sure how bad I am because I don't smell anything to speak of or to smell of but it feels like I'm doing something off and on I guess I'll find out when I strip down for bed. All that being said

I've had a fairly busy day. Half of my safety belt system came undone this morning so that necessitated a trip up Redwood Road to ucat where I was able to get a hold of Robert and refasting strap back onto the seat so I guess I'm safe again. I really don't believe in those restraints are these restraints but I feel better psychologically when I have it in place it also allows me to carry things in the belt itself what should I do appreciate. Like my cell phone and my wallet sometimes and other things I can just sort of put between the band and the belly and they seem to stay there pretty well. Of course it's Thursday that means it's coffee social which the day lasted quite a while because I got visiting with the new person at our facility when we talked for at least an hour after the group ended maybe even longer. We have some strong variables in common and that was nice to talk to her about those kind of things like good old Iona Idaho. When I got back to the apartments I spent some time in the Sun but a lot of time watching a couple old Marvel movies waiting for the news to start. I spent a lot of time trying to keep the poop that they but that's a losing battle. And I'm not sick or anything it's just too much poop in the old body and it's got to come out time and if I was able-bodied it'd be just a matter of going in and sitting down and pooping and then going on for my life. This is what most people do. But every once in awhile my timing gets off and I can't hold it Whatever It Is until my caregiver gets here. Fortunately I just found out she's in the area tonight and I'll stop by and give me and assist. Of course I'm then have to pay for the service which I will use is 20 bucks and that just irks me because of what I mentioned earlier if I had the body I could just do it myself which I did forever. But now I have to pay for everything sort of like what's a poop worth 20 bucks to me that's amazing