Happy birthday Bridg

Happy birthday Bridget before I go any further I just wish to let you know that I love you. I know you are unsure in my feelings for you but just for the record I do love you. I want you to know that and to know I will always love you.

I have always loved our unique relationship—you , my the first born daughter, even though you did not start out life with me as your dad, have always had a special ,place in my heart. We always seemed to be on the cutting edge of something, music, cooking dancing and vehicular accidents. I still cannot believe we got cited for the accident on the way to high school ten years ago. Did I ever tell you how much I appreciated all the time you spent at the office with me in ‘the old days’ at the good UILC. You helped me with the Wasatch Scope, the Neighbor Fair and the annual race.

I loved having you as my teenage daughter you always had something going on something exciting. You were always cool. Defending your brother from the neighborhood “big boy” doing the latest dance in front of the stereo or spending hours infront of the same stereo mastering one more tape for a gift or just an offering for your other dad. Soccer practice and soccer games as well as softball, Sunday mornings at the Tab or just cruising in the Caddy in snow storms we always seem to have a great time.

I missed you that fateful summer when you did not return from vacation with your dad. I was not surprised though I guess you had to go to grow. I never saw you as my carefree single Bridget again. Marriage and a grand daughter, marriage changes everything—I don’t care what anyone says. A dads relations ship changes or morphs with the daughter when marriage is added to thee equation—sharing that person with another guy is always awkward if not just strange. But letting go is part of the dance. But you gave us Anakah our first grand child not only did you present us with Anakah but you let us experience her first year or so right in our house. That was great watching her grow and watching you mother, watching you grow and enter into your next life stage.

So, we are now into the next phase. You and Gabe live a few blocks away, we see you on weekends and sometimes more often. Holidays and birthdays cycle through our lives. Work, play, daycare, medical appointments family integration, inlaws, steps, reals and pets passing into to the next life all leave a devastating imprint on the heart and the mind. I am glad you are slowing down—smell the roses, forget the make-up once in a while you are beautiful just as you are. Keep asking your questions, you have so many questions, keep testing keep asking and I will try to keep passing the tests and knowing the answers. Just know you are loved…