After uploading yesterdays blog about my parents pilfering the wild fruit of Canada in 1964 I begin to doubt myself so to validate to myself that what I wrote was correct I put in a call my brother Ross was just older than myself by five years. What's interesting to me is that his view on life or life during those times is quite a bit different than mine. Interestingly, it's a view through his eyes, much older than mine and probably less selfish than mine or at least regarding me what I was experiencing. Remember, my mom was married maybe twice before she met my dad. And actually adopted Ross and I before meeting the father I grew up with. I think I was Two years old when they married so I really have no memory of another father figure. Again, I should've been the baby of the family. I things not gone the way they did it would've probably just across and me at the house growing up. The reason I say this is because as Ross and I talked I informed him that our oldest brother had died but Ross was already aware. I don't know where he got his information but he is on top of it. I realized then that there is this completely different family construct that I was aware of. My brother shared with me his unique bond to my oldest brother Floyd. Ross was Floyd's little brother much more than I was. Ross actually lived with Floyd or was in Floyd's existence maybe Five years before I came into the picture. That's five years for Floyd act like a big brother he was to Ross. I've never looked at their relationship to these eyes – – fascinating. My brother Floyd was in the Air Force as I mentioned yesterday. He was all over the world and be often communicated with Ross like a real older brother. I think I saw this my head big brother envy like I always seem to have. I was just too small to be treated other than like the baby of the family. Ross hung out with me and was my big brother, teasing, intimidating, frightening etc. there were at times our relationship was kind of Rocky.
Like I said I really wanted Floyd to like me, to be my big brother. Always talk to the kids I knew about my big brother Floyd and how he was all over the world with the Air Force. But now I know that he barely knew that I existed at least not like he knew that Ross existed. Today I was searching my photos from my dilapidated photo albums my mother put together for me. And found one image which kind of said of all for me. It's an image of me standing with my oldest brother Floyd. He looks dashing and kind and thoughtful. I feel I may have lived under that glow of that image for years before I kind give up on him as far as trying to identify with me. Ross however was a different case. Whenever he came to Boise Floyd would always regret away to spend time with Ross. Oddly enough when the best storage Ross ever told me yesterday was when he was in Vietnam on a second deployment. Before he went back into the field he had some further training to accomplish and Floyd, who was career Air Force at the time, actually found Ross was being trained at and put a call through to him. This was almost totally unheard of chasing down an enlisted man like this my brother Floyd pulled off. The discussion with my brother was great. Very enlightening and really helped me understand my other brother even better thanks Ross IOU…
No comments:
Post a Comment