Saturday, October 27, 2018

"To Sleep… To Dream"

Click this link for Talking Heads "And She Was'

I just love the , Talking Heads, don't you? I don't think there is any song of theirs that I do not like. I don't know if it's the time from which I remember I was first exposed to David Byrne and his music but the music has a great way of carry me away to another place and time. But maybe think of this tonight has been pondering flying dreams. This last Thursday at the Coffee Social I was surprised when I made the comment that of all the dreams that I have the dream I enjoy the most is the dream that I'm flying. I don't have that dream very much anymore, but I do enjoy the dream and sensation when I have it. I was kind of surprised when I found that when I said this all the other ladies (yes, I am the only male participant that regularly attends the social and I am the youngest) excitedly agreed. All of them went out on a tangent of talking about their own dream and how strange it was to them. Now, this was kind of a bummer for me because I was using this suggestion of the dream phenomenon of flying to segue into the dream I have of walking – – now I do like I said, have that flying dream – – and how that dream makes me feel.

Of course, did not have this dream before my accident, 50 some years ago. I don't remember how soon after the accident that I started having this walking dream. I do not have the same dream of walking, I have a dream that I'm walking, but it's always in a different environment. Sometimes I had the dream that I'm up and walking and other times I'm sitting, not necessarily in my wheelchair, but then I well for one reason or another standup and walk. What is really weird to me is that I will be walking then suddenly realize I am walking and have this weird feeling that I should not be doing walking. Sometimes I become somewhat frightened that I will suddenly stop walking and fall. This rarely happens in the dream. Another dream I have which is somewhat similar is becoming aware that I'm walking in my dream sequence and not really understanding how I am doing this but it seems somewhat normal. And all the situations I am not walking really well. I sort of have that cerebral palsy stumble phenomenon going on. I'm not embarrassed or frightened as much as I am in a state of wonder, knowing that I should not be walking or that I can't be walking but I am.

When I was an adolescent. My dad and I went to this process of getting me up and crutches, which was really unique for someone with my spinal cord injury. Luckily I had spasticity so significant my legs to stay straight and allowing put weight on them, with great effort than I could actually drag 1 foot in front of the other. I doubt built parallel bars for me to use which I walk up and down every day for a couple of years. And like I said I would also get myself up standing with crutches. None of this, however, was productive and eventually I just realized I'd always be in a wheelchair of one sort or another. I'm not complaining. I just want to share my “walking” dream which I have every once in a while… Not as often as I would like that. Then again I never tire of a walking dream.

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