Monday, December 17, 2018

Trying To Find The Lemonade



Tonight, I'm almost feeling totally defeated and really except for one small item I should be on top of the world in most respects. Today was a good day even though I hardly did anything. I really want to do a meatloaf so I took off early well, as early as I could today be in a bad day at all. My caregiver Dana was back after being gone week it was pretty good to have her back that I did really enjoy working with my old caregiver Honey.

As soon as I got squared away, dressed medicated basically ready for the day. I think offer a fast run over to the market picked up a green pepper for my meatloaf. Most of the truck last night mixing hamburger with the bread I used as well as they onions I processed. I got my things came back to the apartment worked out doing my arm bike. I feel pretty good. I went down to the post office/mailroom and I have three Christmas cards all from my brother's family I was totally impressed. I felt so humble so I don't know if my brother his wife Ruby and son Allen meant to but they sent about a $20 gift I was so amazed two $20 bills and a $25 gift certificate to Starbucks from my nephew! I've never had such an expensive gift that I can remember unless a gift from Dianne or Bridget a piece of clothing desperately needed. These gifts pretty much made by Christmas.

Actually I did spend at least an hour this morning working on my bookmarks. I want to spend at least an hour a day making bookmarks I don't know why just seems this is a piece of art that I can focus on right now. I don't know why I'm so rewarded by making these bookmarks are pretty primitive but maybe that's why I like them so much better so primitive that the art is brute. Right now I'm pretty much pretending but I'm doing art and that someday these little pieces of art these bookmarks will be held in esteem. Actually right now they probably are to some degree I got a text from one of the granddaughters to thank me for the bookmarks I sent them for Christmas in their Christmas cards I've forgotten that I had done but it was nice for Summer to do that.

I waited all day until about 4 o'clock when I finally finished putting my meatloaf together. I've done meatloaf before I like doing meatloaf's but somehow I think I was not ready for this meatloaf. I should have used the soft bread for the bread part of the meatloaf rather than trying to use the drive bread I've been saving. The bread just didn't mash into crumbs the way I wanted but I used rough crumbs anyway hoping that by soaking it all night in the meat that the bread good soften. I think I'm having an issue with trying to cook meat to the prescribed temperatures that is set in Internet and on recipes that I read.I could the meatloaf for the prescribed hour at 400° and when I pulled out I of course set up the fire alarm had to call Diana. I think the temperature of the meat was 160° 10° less than 170° that the literature stated. I shouldn't hold the meatloaf then let it finish cooking knowing that the meat was probably pretty well done even if it didn't read 170°. I let it cook for another 10 minutes and then turn the heat off (which I think is my mistake.). I wasn't going to open up the oven door in and set the fire alarm off. Because I see go to say the meatloaf for another meal and eat some of my beings since I had a pretty rough go of it this morning on the toilet. My open of the beings they were gone stunk something horrible so I ended up throwing them down the drain. I ended up eating half a can of chili hopefully these beings will work. I need to make another bunch of beans hopefully get myself loose again.

I pulled the very warm meatloaf from the oven after about 20 minutes of a cooling down (thank goodness the fire alarm) the meatloaf look pretty rough almost incinerated. I studied at the regardless which is a mistake. The outside of the meatloaf of course are pretty crunchy I didn't pay much attention to this as I put some in the mouth for the taste test the taste test was not bad and I will consume as much of this meatloaf as I can. However somewhere in eating this crunchy meatloaf I somehow knocked off another one of my rear teeth similar to what happened last week. On the to the halfway the back it I think it's the to the dentist worked on actually will have to see tomorrow. Luckily I'm an okay and I don't know where the tooth/piece of tooth went probably swallowed. The only thing I can focus on is once again going over across the street to the dentist and having more work done which will cost more money and keep me in debt. Maybe that's the lesson is that I will never get out of debt and be thankful for what I have at the very second that I have no matter what else is happening. I'm okay, my skin is good, I have a great apartment I live in a great facility surrounded by good people friends and family I'm a no pain in the just keeps sinking further in debt. Life can be a whole lot worse.

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